April 6 2004

Confessions of a Thai driving instructor #1

Confessions of a Thai driving instructor

This true crime story has everything - an oversexed Thai girl, her lecherous Thai driving instructor and a jealous farang boyfriend. Our Mango Sauce Crime Correspondent takes up the story:

Khun Roong was a pretty girl. She was not just tall and slim but was also really quite a bright girl. In fact, she was everything a farang desired. Her latest boyfriend was French (let's call him Pascal) who ran a restaurant in a trendy Sukhumvit soi.

Pascal had found her a nice apartment (living room and kitchen and satellite TV) off one of the more desirable Sukhumvit sois and it was only a five minute journey to visit her on his motorbike in between lunch and dinner or whenever business was slow. Roong had almost everything she could possibly want - but one thing was missing, she decided. She needed a little car.

Her boyfriend laughed when she suggested he buy her one as "ma cherie you cannot drive." But he was soon persuaded to part with 20,000 baht for driving lessons and a promise that, if she passed her test, she would receive the little car she so desperately desired.

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A driving instructor (let's call him Somchai) was employed and such was his skill, and Khun Roong's ability, that after three lessons she was judged able to take her test. Next afternoon she appeared for her test wearing a tight T shirt, the shortest skirt she could find (which was very short) and crisp white underwear that invariably peaked out whenever she moved her legs.

Opening the car door and seeing Roong sitting there holding the steering wheel, with the sweetest smile upon her face, the Driving Examiner was immediately convinced that someone as pretty as this must indeed be highly proficient and was instantly persuaded that the formalities of a driving test and written exam could easily be dispensed with. A little sweetener from Somchai to the Examiner resulted in a pass slip and the promise of a laminated licence in the post next week.

Oh what joy! Roong was ecstatic. She should celebrate her new proficiency. She still had 12,000 baht left-over from her driving lesson money (she'd only given Somchai 8,000 baht) so why not go with her driving instructor to a wine bar (no cola for this girl) and have a congratulatory drink? Off they went and such was her excitement that one bottle of red wine quickly disappeared. Remembering she had a bottle of Pascal's champagne in her fridge at home she suggested a new venue. Within a twinkling of an eye they were back at her apartment and downing good French champagne. Alas, that's not all that came down as soon the inevitable happened and Roong's crisp white underwear was quickly discarded as Somchai sought to teach Roong some advanced driving techniques.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch (well restaurant actually) business was slow and so Pascal decided that he could be spared for an hour and grabbing a motorcycle he set out with passion in his loins to visit Khun Roong.

Within a few minutes he was outside her apartment door and fitting his key in the lock. Strange, the key turned but the door wouldn't open - it was bolted from the inside. He knocked, listened and heard strange moaning sounds coming from inside. Merdre! Robbers in the house. Perhaps his Cherie was tied-up (well in a sort of way she was). Applying his shoulder he began to break down the door.

Concluding episode: Confessions of a Thai driving instructor #2.

[Posted to Your Letters by David]

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