September 15 2003
Smile, you're in Thai jail

Thai jail: Not much to smile about
After a busy day sidestepping sadistic guards, bullying their fellow prisoners and taking turns to lie down in grossly overcrowded cells, many inmates of Thailand's notorious jails choose to relax with a drug fix and a satisfying bum-rape.
Last week, prison tours where laid on so that misbehaving vocational students could see for themselves just how awful the conditions are in Thai jails. On being shown the toilets, many pledged to change their ways.
The food isn't very nice either. In his book The Damage Done, Aussie ex-prisoner Warren Fellows explains that the food was so bad that many prisoners preferred to feed it to the swarming cockroaches - and then eat the cockroaches. A handful of the smelly insects ground up in a cup were the nearest thing they had to a tasty, nutritious snack.
According to Fellows, many foreign prisoners found a release in hard drugs. These were allegedly purchased straight from the guards. How ironic that it was often minor drug offences that got them there in the first place.
For some, the ordeal proved too much and they went mad. In one of the book's most harrowing passages, intolerant guards beat a crazed westerner unconscious and dragged him by the feet down some concrete stairs. His head smashed on every step and by the time they reached the bottom his brains were spilling onto the floor.
Some of his stories illustrate the lighter side of prison life. For a few packets of cigarettes you could fuck a pig on the prison farm and for a couple of packets more you could enjoy the attentions of a female one.
Last week, the Bangkok Post reported how four inmates of Nonthaburi Jail were publicly beaten by a guard. On a drain-cleaning detail at the Public Health Ministry, the four were left to carry on while the guard enjoyed a drink with his buddies. When he returned, things were not to his satisfaction so he beat the crap out of them in full public view. Horrified Ministry staff called the police. No arrest was made but the incident was reported in the papers.
At a hastily arranged press conference the cringing prisoners were paraded before the media. A Corrections Department official said there would be an inquiry into the beating but added that the prisoners had not yet voiced any complaint. Well, fancy that.
Despite the horrors, some foreign inmates do all they can to resist serving their sentence in their home country. I began to understand the reason for this when I bumped into a British guy who was over to visit his friend in jail. Apparently, his wealthy friend had secured himself a bungalow in the prison grounds together with luxuries such as a cellphone. Similar claims were also made publicly by massage magnate turned whistle-blower Chuwit Kamolvisit.
Such refinement is only for the wealthy few so avoiding a long stretch makes good sense. In practical terms, this means walking away from trouble, avoiding drug users and checking your date's date of birth on her ID card (subtract 543 from the Thai date). Most jailed foreigners are in for drug offences. Typically, a personal use cannabis bust in Europe warrants little more than a slap on the wrist. Not so in Thailand.
The Government is fighting a drug problem far worse than anything yet seen in the west. The country is awash with pills; most of them smuggled in from Burma to finance various guerrilla armies. Desperate times have led to desperate measures. Suspected drug dealers are routinely shot. Some estimates put the death toll at around 3,000 but, in the wake of international criticism, official figures are no longer published.
Some complacent ex-pats reckon that the going rate for buying yourself out of a small dope bust is about B15,000. They may well be right but what happens if the arresting officer is honest or, more plausibly, just doesn't like farangs? Perhaps his favourite mistress has just run off with a rich American. Let's face it, you are toast.
Useful phrases
You are my bitch
G? o pen tua mia kh?èrng chan
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That pig sure has a real pretty mouth
M?èo t?™e n?¢n mee p? ak s??ay n?¢ir n?¢ir leree
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Visit prisoners
You can visit foreign prisoners and bring them small gifts. Find out more at:
www.khaosanroad.com/bangedup.htm
[Posted to Thai Secrets by David]
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