January 13 2004

Patpong ping pong pussy banana show

Shy Bangkok showgirl blasts fruit over 15ft.

On Friday night, I stumbled in on one of Patpong's notorious upstairs ping-pong pussy banana shows. The star-turn was a hefty Thai farm-girl with few inhibitions. Though she kept her bra on, shyness didn't stop her blasting dozens of bananas from her pussy. Her effective range was an amazing 15ft and the entire audience took a heavy barrage. It's a rare skill, even in Thailand, and her mother must be very proud.

Our arrival was greeted by a scrum of frenzied girls and I retained the services of the bikini-clad fun-bunny who had climbed onto my lap. Her chat was predictable, so I asked her to sit quietly and be my human-shield against the flying fruit. She consumed two lady drinks and only got hit by one banana so I reckon that she was the big winner.

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You have to admire the showmanship that can elevate the humble fanny-fart to a spectacle worthy of an international audience. During our evening of non-stop gynaecological fun, 2 girls in particular caught my attention. The first used her pussy to take heavy draws from not one but two cigarettes and the second inserted a marker-pen and used the movement of her hips to write. It was an impressive party-trick but she did cheat a couple of times by moving the paper.

I didn't actually feel aroused by any of this. Instead, I found myself pondering the health risks to the first and admiring the calligraphy of the second.

In a totally unrelated incident, I was in Black & White Bar on Soi Cowboy last week when an overexcited farang bloke took to the stage. As if this weren't bad enough (See Make a tit of yourself in a Thai go-go bar) he stripped stark-bollock naked and started waving his willy around. Thankfully, this unpleasant spectacle was cut short when a quick-thinking go-go dancer donated her sarong. It didn't so much cover his modesty as hide his inadequacy.

[Posted to Sex by David]

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