She Comes Home to Me

Iffy says:

Re. Some guys take pride in the fact that their favourite Thai bar girl doesn't charge them for sex.

You pay now, or you pay later; you still pay.

Iffy

TANAI KWAI says:

Folks, the song must be heard to be fully appreciated -- even those who don't care for Sandler have to admit it is pure genius.

(enjoy)

Troon Time says:

I hate Adam Sandler.

I read the song and found myself laughing paroxysmally.

Troon

Troon

David says:

Adam Sandler's dreary "simpleton wins girl with goof-ball antics" movies are truly dreadful but, after reading this, I can't hate him anymore. He's painfully funny so why does he waste his talent on shite?

TANAI KWAI says:

Sandler stretches more in his comedy albums.* He once read a script I co-wrote about a pathologically competitive father and son who pursue the same woman. It was a comedy, and funny -- but it was really mean-spirited and raw. They passed, not because they didn't agree (they said), but because his core audience doesn't want to see him in those kinds of ambivalent roles.

If you've seen Punch-Drunk Love, where he was brilliant, you'll see he is capable of much more. While a critical success, that film was a dismal box-office failure and Sandler squandered some good will since a lot of his fans were confused and felt short-changed.

In H O L L Y W O O D, everyone and everything is a product.

By the way, the song discussed is available in a wide variety of places and formats, including Apple i-tunes.

(...)

*If you really like to laugh, check out "Triumph The Insult Comic Dog" -- the funniest MF on the planet. For starters, watch "Triumph Does the Weather"... but have your adult diapers handy.

http://www.nbc.com/nbc/Late_Night_with_Conan_O'Brien/video/triumph.shtml

ALI GATOR says:

"You pay now, or you pay later; you still pay."

The words used by all those who can no longer score free pussy.

Iffy says:

Ali Gator,

Many thanks for your perceptive and insightful riposte. How do you do it? Marvellous!

In the context of Thai bar girls, which is what the comment was about, I stand by what I wrote. If you don't believe it's true may your God help you.

Iffy

Toby says:

Hey fuck you guys, i don't pay for that shit. well anymore than you would have to pay if you're trying date a girl back home.
but i have no problem paying for it either, as long aslong as i get to live out my fantasies i'm happy.

i' think a lot of the young guys can get away with not paying for a lot of hook ups.
but when you're young that's what you do, you fuck, and then you get old and nobody wants to fuck you or you're too old to fuck, then only a lucky few will still get to fuck. just my out look on fucking.

JAM says:

For the record.

Triumph the insult comic dog is a direct rip off of Ed the sock... well known in the industry that Conan's writers "came up" with the idea of the insult dog two weeks after seeing an audition tape of Ed who was to appear on their show.. Triumph is funny, Ed is much more so.

ALI GATOR says:

Iffy,

Always glad to do my part.

Old fogies love to cry foul about us young guys gettin free pussy. Whether its from a bargirl or not, it really doesnt matter. They'd be doing it too if they still could, but most of them cant so they pay. Do you think NEP, Cowboy and the like are surviving on the under 30 crowd?

John U says:

Ali Gator,

There's no such thing as a free lunch.

There's no such thing as free pussy.

The most expensive pussy you'll ever get is the one you are married to.

This is the voice of experience.

TANAI KWAI says:

(01) For the record:
(02)
(03) I don't believe -- strike that please, Ms. Reporter...
(04)
(05) Can we go off the record, please?

I am not familiar with the Ed the Sock scuttlebut as I am not "in the industry."

I do not think Triumph the dog has much in common with Ed the sock, either in appearance, species, voice, accent, comic sensibility, or otherwise. You assert he is a "direct ripoff,"and that is why we have copyright litigation. Nor do I find Ed remotely as funny as Triumph, and that is why we have the court of public opinion.

Robert Smigel, the creative force behind Triumph (the part he didn't rip off anyway), is one of the most creative, talented people out there. Just one guy's opinion.

(back on the record, please)

Bruce Mangosteen says:

Although I enjoy reading this blog, the stereotypes that are sometimes bandied around here are astounding, topped only by their more banal cousins, the tired cliches. Let's examine some of the ones found here in this thread.

Everybody who pays for pussy HAS to. The only people who get free lovin' are young. NEP and its ilk are only there because guys get old, and old guys can't get laid. Only a loser pays to play. Old guys are jealous every time a young guy talks some slag out of her knickers.

Rather than commenting, I will just let these stereotypes sit there, and allow the smell they're giving off to speak for itself.

The original topic of this thread is a song that makes fun of guys who think that they and their relationship are something special just because they don't give their working prosty girlfriend money for sex. Among other things, it's a comment on the blindness and apparent brain-damage that love-struck guys can be afflicted with. This is an entirely commonplace situation in Thailand, and is therefore very apropos for this blog. Nice job, David!

The questions of whether a guy who is with an "honest" girl pays for sex, or why anyone should pay a working girl for sex, are something of a tangent. However, they are worth remarking on.

The comment that seems to have gotten the attention of all the young studs out there is, "You pay now, or you pay later; you still pay." It takes a little life experience to understand the truth in this comment.

This doesn't mean that nobody ever gets laid for free, and it CERTAINLY doesn't mean that only young guys get laid for free! It means several things:

1) If a guy ever wants to move upscale from slimy trollops who will fuck anybody for free, to a girl one can actually admit to screwing, that better class of girl will expect dinner, drinks, movies, gifts, and other "tokens of your appreciation".

2) If a guy wants a steady diet of pussy, sooner or later there is an exchange of value. You may as well count on that.

3) Girls have various ways to use sex to beguile unwary guys who think that their semen is a sought-after gift any girl should rightly treasure. This is not to portray all women as evil witches trying to take advantage of unwary small-head-thinking male morons. It is a game we're all playing, and sex happens to be one of the game pieces. One way or the other, girls eventually try to use sex to get things from guys. The question is, are you one of the guys who are aware of this?

Some guys just don't see that girls generally trade sex for security in various ways. Not ALL girls, not ALL the time. However, the fact remains. This is the principal reason why a girl will eventually leave her fuck-for-fun paramour and his "solid-gold" spunk for a guy who promises her a future. The poor stud-toy didn't even see it coming! "How could she do that to ME??" he sobs.

The fact is, the gift of our precious semen is just not enough for a girl to build a life out of. She needs a house, a car, food, and that foldin' money. Those of us who have been around the block a few times have seen the consequences of guys not keeping these things in mind.

Yes, this is a generalization. However, it is based on years of real-world experience, and is generally accepted as true in terms of being the common experience of many guys, not only me.

Some comments about paying girls to play:

- I have more respect for a girl who sells sex than I have for one who gives it away to every swinging dick she meets.

To sell something means that you place a value on it. This is the reverse of what we are taught to believe about sex, so it can be counter-intuitive at first. However, consider: If a girl fucks everybody for free, how much value does she place on her own body and soul? And, how much value does she put on you as a person? Do you care?

- To me, if a girl is a "working girl", and a guy contrives to fuck her without paying, he is guilty of something akin to shoplifting.

The working girl is usually using whatever means she has, perhaps the ONLY means, to try to make more than a poverty-line wage. This is ESPECIALLY true in Thailand.

I was once thumbing through one of those "bar girls tell all" books in a bookstore while my girlfriend was next door picking out her latest pair of shoes. One comment really hit me, and I remember it years later: "I wanted to be a nurse when I grew up, or maybe a teacher. Nobody goes through their childhood dreaming of fucking thousands of strangers for money." Thailand is a very old-fashioned country. For these girls, selling sex is usually a last resort.

Maybe the girl is supporting a kid after her husband or last boyfriend split with his new woman. Maybe she's taking care of aged parents. Maybe she is helping her younger sister go through university so the sister doesn't have to sell sex too. Maybe her motives are not this noble (although they often are). Whatever the case may be, when a guy screws her for free, he is using a revenue-generating service she and probably her family depend on without paying for it.

I don't mean to imply that the working girl is unaware or unwilling when her handsome suitor charms the sweet stuff out of her for free. Quite the contrary. While prosties (and their "honest" sisters, for that matter) sometimes fuck for fun, fucking with no APPARENT payment expected is sometimes according to plan. That's the shit you gotta watch out for.

Believe me, if a working girl lets a guy go free once or twice, she often sees it as an investment. It's a loss-leader, a free sample to try to make a bigger sale later.

If the guy sees her more than once or twice and doesn't pay, the girl will eventually try to get some value back; if she cannot, she will generally move on from that perhaps young, adonis-like stud to another guy (maybe also young and adonis-like, maybe not) until she starts getting value back. I know many Thai girls who have done this; if I used their names here the long-term expats reading this would doubtless say, "I know that girl too!" (And, not only because they all have the same names! LOL!)

I don't mean this only about Thai prosties either. You will also recognize this as normal behavior for prosties in other countries, and for non-prosties as well.

As I see it, fucking a prosty for free is the same as shoplifting from a store. The store owner might let you back in a time or two more, because if you start buying again he can make the lost money back and more. However, keep shoplifting and after a while you'll be barred from entering. There's no upside to letting you in, only a downside.

- Paying a girl to play is usually easy and guilt free for both parties.

Sex for pay is sometimes preferable. Everybody gets what they want from the encounter. Nice and clean. No misunderstandings, no hurt feelings. All parties walk away having gotten what they want. Like any good business deal, if done right and fairly, all participants go away believing they got the best of it. No harm, no foul.

This can be a real relief from the usual business of working those smarmy pick-up lines and boring bullshit stories to get to the wet stuff. Better relief than Antacil is just a pink coupon away, and you can be back at the bar with your mates for last orders! There's a lot to like about this scenario sometimes.

By the way, yes, we old guys DO know how to get laid for free; in many cases that's why you young guys are here in the first place. Casual sex existed before the year 2000, you know; the methods for successfully walking the ol' trouser trout haven't changed since we invented them. Are all of you stud-cadets sure that guy who lives with your mom is your BIOLOGICAL dad?

In conclusion: Older guys are getting laid for free, too. Some of us just think that a quick BJ for haa-loy baht is preferable sometimes, and believe that it takes a real cad to rip off a prosty.

If young guys are scoring free pussy from girls they are meeting in situations other than go-go bars etc., we think that's great. So are we older guys. Maybe your last conquest lubed up so quick because I was there an hour before you! :)

JAM says:

Tanai

"I do not think Triumph the dog has much in common with Ed the sock, either in appearance, species, voice, accent, comic sensibility, or otherwise."

I get it more clearly now you just like to disagree for the sake of disagreeing... that's fine. Let's look at your above statement. Not much in common..hmmmmm they both are hand puppets, they both smoke cigars they both get their laughs from insulting people and being abrasive. I don't know how much more in common they could be without a lawsuit being a slam dunk. Not to mention that one of them didn't exist until after a tape of the other was viewed by the writers in question, again that is a verifiable fact.

"You assert he is a "direct ripoff,"and that is why we have copyright litigation."

From what I understand there was a suit filed, whether it's been settled or not I don't know.

"Nor do I find Ed remotely as funny as Triumph, and that is why we have the court of public opinion"

I don't know how to break this to you, sit down it might be a blow.. but YOU aren't the public.. merely one tiny little part. Again for the record Ed has been on TV for going on ten years now... he must be doing something right.

Please dont' get me wrong I am not The Socks biggest fan I can't remember the last time I watched one of his shows right through, but I really can't stand the way you assume because you say something it's fact.

Go ahead make your expected little follow up barb that you will no doubt think is witty beyond compare.... I'm betting you don't wear hats

TANAI KWAI says:

Jam, back that thing up...

"hmmmmm they both are hand puppets, they both smoke cigars they both get their laughs from insulting people and being abrasive."

Well, I certainly see your point. And I didn't recall that Ed smoked a cigar. That being said, I'm sure you know Triumph was also sued (in trademark) by the defunct Pets.com for being a rip-off of their sock puppet dog. To quote you, "hmmmmm." They were both hand puppets, they were both dogs, they both got their laughs from subversive comments and interacting with real animals.

http://www.mavericktimes.com/triumph.html

How many puppets did Triumph rip off? I'm sure Howdy Doody will come out of the "woodwork" any day now. (Get it? Oh, nevermind.)

"I don't know how much more in common they could be without a lawsuit being a slam dunk. Not to mention that one of them didn't exist until after a tape of the other was viewed by the writers in question, again that is a verifiable fact."

Not wanting to disagree gratuitously but the elements of copyright infringement are not an easy burden to carry. The only cases that are truly "slam dunks" tend to be when somebody buys a book, photocopies it, and sells it for personal profit. The intellectual property law regimes seek not only to protect intangible assets but also to avoid stifling creativity. We both recognize that everything is a derivative work, to a degree. That being said, I would make a lot of hay about the fishy timing if I were representing Ed but I would not hold out much hope for a win. I won't belabor the differences between the two characters but they seem quite substantial (in my opinion) and I daresay a court would agree -- for purposes of the legal standard and a successful claim, anyway.

"From what I understand there was a suit filed, whether it's been settled or not I don't know."

Neither, as far as I can tell. Again, tough to prove and hiring somebody like O'Melveny at $600/hour is often prohibitively expensive.

"I don't know how to break this to you, sit down it might be a blow.. but YOU aren't the public.. merely one tiny little part."

I did happen to be seated when I read this. I should not have stated that "I am the court of opinion and nobody else gets a vote." Come on.

"Please dont' get me wrong I am not The Socks biggest fan I can't remember the last time I watched one of his shows right through, but I really can't stand the way you assume because you say something it's fact."

Dude, I love Triumph. I love Robert Smigel. Not wild about Ed the Sock. Don't think I could get my Triumph fix by watching Ed the Sock because Ed doesn't make me laugh. That's all. You are welcome to disagree -- and you have. Wouldn't have it any other way.

Are you in the industry?

(...)

Bunthom says:

Free pussy comes with baggage, which is a cost in itself. Sometimes pay for play is cheaper, both in the short run and long run.

stu_$ says:

alright, im insomniac this week
so here's my two cents ...

i'm a young guy who has had "free" crumpet
not always but once , and it was a working girl
but , big deal...who gives a shit

how do you think those old guys get to be old ?
it's cause they made it ,
life is a marathon , not a sprint ...
why do you think sean connery has been voted
worlds sexiest man more than once ?

and he's over 60 !
obviously chicks dig it ,i accept that

if you went to have your car serviced
would you want a 19yrold workin on your motor
or the 45 yr old ?
who you think has seen it ALL ?

well, maybe not all...but you know what i mean
experience pays big dividends...
my uncle told me youth is wasted on the young
that was 10 yrs ago, at the time i thought he was an old fart but now i'm about to turn 30
i know he's right...

young dudes, if your gettin it "on the house "
good luck to you but think of this
those ladies arent as dumb as you think
they have dreams and goals in life...and
will do what they can to get there, same as you

and if you are smart , you'll respect your elders
if your lucky ,you might learn somethin

satori says:

short time good for man.. LOng time good for girl.... Sound advice