Nana Disco "walk of shame"

chris says:

that nana plaza video makes it look like a nightmare,hang on it is.i dont think those bar girls would be happy if they come across this vid.i mean is that allowed?also can someone tell me is prostuiton legall here lol!

Common Sense says:

For fucks sake, with all the dubious shit that goes on in Thailand these lame assed videos were all that could be come up with. Hell you could have at least thrown in a drunk assed Jarhead eating the banana. I'll volunteer to do the deed once again just for the sake of entertainment.

Prufrock says:

Well I'm pretty sure that classy lookin'"good girl in a bad place" in the above shot might be able to manage the banana, there, CS.
Where the f*ck have YOU been?

dingdongrb says:

"Where the f*ck have YOU been?"

Suckin you up my ass feedin you on my chit and shootin out my pecker hole...

Need I say more???

ozzyboyz says:

pretty dumb stuff the thai gov will get upset like they do about their image oversea and have a crack down on nana

Common Sense says:

Prufers,
I've just been laying low. Got tired of the same-same recycled conversations about U.S. foregin policy that had been taking place non-stop between here and Tanai's site. These conversations are becoming the farang equivalent of the "So what's the weather like" conversation I generally have with my grandparents or other people with nothing worthwhile to talk about. Titties and beer is more my speed nowadays. Haven't got time for much else.

Grunt says:

Could not friggin resist the crosslink "Katoeys or Ladybody in Phuket doing their stuff"

The video begs the question, how the HELL do these ladyboys afford fake tits?!

David, you need to do a in depth story on this, as some of those katoeys looked a fair bit better then the average American female.

ArtTv says:

Here is a video of "The Katoeys of Nana"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbxhKX7xphI

The images are available in book form at
http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/33053

For more information check out
The Nana Journals at
http://nanajournals.blogspot.com/
Thanks
ArtTv

JackO says:

Video without consent is against the law in Thailand

Mr Thaksin, BKKchat.org says:

yeaaaaaaa agree,

but still great little boxes.

Thaxo.

ozricdan says:

great music.............

ozricmann says:

its amazing but for the last month ive been getting on with what i do work and socially but now im back checking out mangosauce once again.

im wondering if this could escalate into a serious condition.

or maybe i have mangosauce syndrome,
im going to have to block this site because i need to get a life.......

no wait....mai pen rai!

bring it on, why search for the good stuff in thailand when mangosauce brings it straight to me.

Carrie says:

Oy Summers you prick. What is all this BS about 'stepping up to the challenge'? You freak, mutant, stalking asshole. You cowered in abject fear before my challenge you little pussy. You wet your pants about taking on a woman and now you tell the whole farang community you are some ninja warrior? You thought you were a laughing stock before? You ain't seen nothing yet Keithy boy. C'mon Keithy, take me on, show the farang community what you are really made of.

Pants Elk says:

Prufers, she could not only "manage the banana", she could probably assemble the banana rack with her own rack ...
(obscure Ikea reference lost on 99.999% of Mango Saucers ...)

Landmark Larry says:

I'll be over there soon so I'll see if I can capture some moving images from the blowjob bar in Patpong. Perhaps I'll fit a tiny camera to my knob, then we can see the look of curiosity on the face of one of the lovely ladies who takes a dive inside my Levis.

William Mahanakorn says:

It is a spooky place. I used to refer to it is a dark pachinko machine of my moral conscience, from which I (the silver ball) bounced from the top floor, pingig from bar to bar, until I ended up disgraced, hungover and poor on the sidewalk (or in Thermae). For the Thai foot-fancier, I've added a nice clip on www.thaipeeps.blogspot.com.

Pants Elk says:

Larry - "I'll fit a tiny (HOW TINY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT HERE?) camera to my knob, then we can see the look of curiosity (AND DISAPPOINTMENT?) on the face of one of the lovely ladies who takes a dive inside my Levis."

Matt says:

"Video without consent is against the law in Thailand"

So is prostitution.

Road Natzi says:

Sounds like Summers has given Carrie another 'fisting' with the claw of a grizzly bear and shes gone and got all aggressive again, dirty whore she is.

whats the matter carrie, still can't find any bloke drunk enough to phark you?

You and Keith fucking Summers would make a great couple = WEIRDOS

chris says:

this guy will be in a lot of trouble is his email on youtube.for his sake i hope not,i think its invasion of privacy,a women should be allowed to be a whore its an utter disgrace.

Carrie says:

Hey Toad Nutzi,

You must be sucking Keithy's teeny, diseased, rotting dick, you seem to be such a big cheerleader of his. You faggy boys disgust me. Tell you what, to make things REALLY EASY, I will take both you little homos on together next time I am in Thailand (soon). Your choice of weapons: probably handbags and wet handkerchiefs for you two. Me, I don't need a weapon with a couple of little pansy fuckers like you. C'mon, what was it Keithy said this week? 'I'm a STEP UP kind of guy'and 'braver than a tiger'. Well fucking talk the talk boyz, 'STEP UP' to the challenge. Nutzi, I will even let you wear your tin WWII Nazi helmet and jackboots for protection.

ron says:

that bitch is psycho.

Dana says:

"A mass hatching of sea turtles can't hold a candle to this nightly spectacle."

Funny line David--keep'um comin'.

Dana

carl says:

Tell ya what. I'll be over there in 2 weeks. I am willing to sanction the "Morons in the Mango" fight between Summers and Carrie. 200 baht entry fee to see the girliemen get it on with the winner taking 70/30 split of the purse. What say you?

carl says:

If not already known, I believe we have exposed Mark Guitre as the "Nana Plaza Prowler". A fuzzy glimpse of his mug at 5:03 on the 2nd clip bears some resemblance me thinks.

not a fan says:

wow, that first video ended up taking me on a youtube journey through Nana, Cowboy, with the end destination of Pattaya.

While the trip was nice, and good for a memory, nothing beats the real thing. And nothing beats the real thing knowing that you are not going to end up on youtube. There is no need for poor Frank, to go on a nice holiday to Thailand, and get videotaped walking hand in hand with a tiny nana ho, and then having that tape end up on some douchebags youtube site. Or poor Steve, who was supposed to be over there working on the papers for the business deal, but was instead seen on Soi Cowboy with with a tasty young thing. (Good thing the business deal went through). Or what about Jim, who told his wife he was just going out with his mates.... you get my gist.

So fellas, leave the cameras in your pockets, and worry about the other thing in your pocket. And if you must bring them out, (the camera) dont feel like you have to be a badass and post in on the internet. And if you must post vids on the internet, then post videos of your self for crying out loud.

Can I get an AMEN?

Dana says:

Correction David:

It's no walk of shame. The women walk in proud and happy and they walk out proud and happy. That is what makes them so appealing. Feminism? Equal rights? Silly stuff measured against the hormone filled confident women who walk in the lobby on the way to Angels and then walk through the lobby again on the way home. It's no walk of shame.

People from the West simply can not imagine it. No yelling, no public dispays, no drunken behavior--discreet and proud and overtly sexual. The way life is supposed to be.

Faber & Faber says:

Soo good to see MS back...now I can start baiting Keith Summers again. The little queg has not been forgotten and will be villified from here to Kingdom Cum!

Carrie sounds interesting...

Nana is a right ol' shithole...

Dana is way off the mark. It is a walk of shite, not shame, because the talent is non-existent in Angels. People see one half decent looking brass and exclaim she is well fit. That's because all the other bird's look like burglar's dogs! Actually, I see less and less tasty lookin' hookers because there are so many "macam kor dio dam duay" types.

"I may switch to wanking with a velvet glove..." ( quote from Road Natzi)

Welcome back David and Fuck off Keith

dingdongrb says:

Sounds like 'notafan' has a lot to hide. Is it from his wife, boss, mistress, or all his BGFs? hmmmmmmm

1) Don't get married or else marry a woman who doesn't mind sharing.

2) Who gives a fu*k what that boss thinks after hours? Is your job 24/7? Does he pay you for your personal time? Or are you embarrassed of what your coworkers might think of you? (Maybe it'll take away you chances of getting shagged by your ugly arsed fat farang secretary.)

3) Who needs a mistress if you live, play, and work in Thailand?

4) If you have more than one Thai BGF you're looking for trouble in the first place. Cause they don't need the Internet to find out!

Amen for modern technology and the Internet videos!!!

dingdongrb says:

"If not already known, I believe we have exposed Mark Guitre as the "Nana Plaza Prowler". A fuzzy glimpse of his mug at 5:03 on the 2nd clip bears some resemblance me thinks."

Yepper, just the typical description of the sex craved farang. i.e. Old, glasses, and bald (errrr or just a shiny dome)... (Only missing the pot-belly)

Faber and Faber says:

Check this out: Keith the NINJA!

http://whatismatt.com/
ninja-keith-summers-a-force-to-be-reckoned-with/

Pants Elk says:

What Dana said. Only I'd leave out the "discreet" bit.

Road Natzi says:

f & f,

Listen chap, I don't remember ever talking about a 'Velvet Glove', can you re-direct me to that quote? I need to check it out.

Ohh and keep 'batting' away, you are more than entertaining.

Road Natzi says:

Carrie,

I find it interesting that you describe Keiths cock, the way you do. I can't argue the toss tho u crazy yabba slut, I aint never met the gay prick summers and I aint ever gonna meet you.

Lets face it Carrie, you are a no-body, no-one, nutter, zero, loser bitch. You are yet to 'post' anything on either Mango or TK's site that is worth even a pinch of shit. You only offer abuse & u and summers should really get together, he's use to fucking ugly hairy arse, so really you should be no challenge.
Then again, I reakon you would have one ugly big arse, with dagged hair & the stimulation of your brain which is kept inside 'thunderbox' of a head of yours, truely scares me. You are one queer bitch, now please, return to your 'PLASTIC FIST' and resume you're masturbation.

Sorry David, I promised I would pick the post's up, this will be my last degrading message to Carrie, perhaps you could organise some more electric shock treatment for her.

Dicer says:

"discreet and proud and overtly sexual. The way life is supposed to be...." -Dana

Really? You call that proud? And the way "life is supposed to be?" In what way? Watching the hundreds of geezers march out of the disco in their mild stupor I think about the alternating testosterone and estrogen. Suddenly you get the grandma stuff and they beam foggily, but kindly at the mutant tarts like grandparents at naughty grandkids. I think for the geezer estrogen takes over. When you see a couple march out together the tart pumps discreet testosterone (as opposed to hormone) and appear malish to the other tarts (the inter tart reactions we don't notice of course), all a slosh of chemicals...imagine that.

ESTROGEN ANALYSIS

The Nana March is symbolic of many things that follow. It all starts with the happy life is the good life and "good" means in this case not virtue but logging 2000 in Nana notes and diddling a trimmed village prostitute. As each euro-yank Waldo makes two to three appearances at the Nana disco he starts off huffing and puffing with: "wull let me tell you about these women..." At 260 lbs waddling and lame he could tell you about holiday romance. Why on earth would there be romance in Nana in 2007 for a Waldo to begin with? The guy has spent an entire lifetime with Saxon women (let's call them agressive tight arse busybody cunts, and thats when they're not suffering pre-menstrual nuclear meltdown) refusing to give him the time of day and here is trying to discuss love with mutant Thai tarts like something that even the French wouldn't watch if turned into a film.

Is this sex and happiness (a la Mill) then?

The great Nana disco march experiment is there to pretend wean society of restrictions - cultural ones that is - and take out any hint of rules that are obviously there. So instead of going to a Boston churchyard to meet a straggly haired Irish girl you are supposed to fly out to BKK four times a year, and join in the gambit of the do it yourself and go nuts reality. What it means is if, for instance, you invoke Mill's happiness in trying to show how good and ok your Nana march is - after all it's about going hysterical with the idea of personal freedom wrapped up in the monumental delusion that these girls are schooled by tradition in the art of pleasing men - there is also an equally corresponding neat list of anti stagnation quotes running through thinking that make the same mutant tarts you saw in the YouTube clip seem smaller and smaller until they disappear; in their atemporal non-aware introverted ways they think they are up with the world. A toe ahead writhing in their own self imposed retardation they probably also assume the world is the same and a Nana march normal and exciting. In fact it is as exciting as a dead mouse in a loaf of bread.

Why, there's nothing like the same idea of happiness to blow them out of their coconut trees of course. Mill's or anyone's idea of happiness SEEMS the perfect guide for any deprived Western man and his 'experiment' with these girls, adorned as they are with smiles and seemingly normal non-abusive antlike behaviour ...sure...but it is at the end of the day the wrong place and the wrong time for anything "normal."

PIGGY STRIDE IS THE LIFE

Saxons Teutons and Goths for all their foibles seem to have a nonstop thing about rights, morals and shame. What we see is not pride or shame or how life should be but a mindless low culture gin moo (eat pig) stomp which I call the piggy stride, by the smug flat footed so so hooker laden with new faux Gucci, in a short dirty denim skirt and just minutes away from a huge sulk and pout. A hooker I may add who tells you later in bed she's probably got the runs after a somtam poo or the like and locks herself in the bathroom. Gin Moo is the perfect term. Eat the foreign pig. It's the semiotic equivalent of Duke Roland in Ohio taking your cattle pasture because his great cousin was Rollo who used to howl at the moon and drink blood.

What do you do? You resort to unscrewing locks and hiding cash under rugs just so that you'd feel safe while playing out your recondite fantasies. As you clock more air miles I imagine each one of you Danas become hardened and the more technical you get - like carrying in your bum bag a portable torchlight to examine the not so cute hooker on the dance floor for HSV-2 before committing on her for the night. In any case you are still moving further and farther away from how life should be until in this last case you become a walking drug store and gadget collector just so that your 8 hours sexual marathon is devoid of pitfalls.

Shot of a few testosterone shots and let loose in the disco parade it does not matter to you of course. You've flown 5,000 miles for a rental at the meat market without the vice squad in your hair. Oh, gee...but look, this is testing the known limits of idiopsychotic coupling with mutants and I feel Darwin would be proud (or gag and puke his lunch up.) The way life is supposed to be, of course.

THE NANA MARCH

When anyone goes to these places for the first time he will invariably and madly fall in love with 6 tarts at the same time. Reduce that to one per night and turn over the cash and get the temporary smile. Digress a little here. In northern Thailand the Waldos (those who don't know the hill girls) find the inevitable 28 year old massage lady who could be ex-peasant or old mamasan or whatever. They then get the villa, get cleaned out and waffle out in an estrogen induced be nice grandmother style while hit with spells and poison, but in Nana disco there are too many illusions. When Waldos show up from the airport they smile so hard but in no time they find that the marching tarts are pure illusion. A few mornings later they are existentially lost. Now you can only get slightly excited about the Chiang Mai 28 year old lady but the hot 18 year old from Nakon Sawan in the Nana Disco or Pattaya disco- "I LIKE F" tattooed on her back - is another thing. The ILLUSION is accentuated to the point of near madness. For some reason the central Thai girls like the freelance deal more than the lao or northern variety. They are also the ones who are usually found throat slit in the local klong and splashed day after day on the local papers. Something about a central Thai hooker and her uninhibited ways as opposed to the lao hooker who's usually dressed like a suburban frau on her way to the gym. The tourist characters, a whole factory production line of farang slobs who lost their "jello" minds long ago and now with fluctuating estrogen smile and beam as they march out of the disco with synapses all nice and fuzzy.

Wull..aren't these pretend hookers anyway? Isn't Angel a pretend disco? Aren't the go-go girls pretend dancers? Aren't we in a pretend country after all?

Let's say deprevation, capitalism, fuzzy neo-pagan liberal ideas and alienation lead more men into the habit of flying 5000 miles for the Nana march. Or staying there for good. Fine, you are smart and enjoy it. But no point in romanticising a paid-for lowlife meat parade as a "discreet and proud" show of talent. That would simply be to expect the pretend rice hookers to adjust to your distorted view of them.

As for the lack of agression or outright violence in the meat market I attribute it to that same response I got from Major Pedro at a small Mexican border crossing once. He leafed through my passport and said nonchalantly, "Signor you do not have a health insurance," neither interested in the passport nor my health insurance. I took a crispy five dollar note stretched it and put it on Major Pedro's desk. He threw a piece of paper over it and said, "have a good time in Mexico now," followed by a guffaw. You meet, giggle "make lab" and pay a mutant hooker. Same as going to an appliance store or bribing a cop. Just another commodity in a third world market. Too many times toing and froing to mutantland and we see pride and talent eh?

Life is becoming more and more chronic dissatisfaction peppered now and then with long distance sport fucking. The geezers who go nuts on the Nana march are simply overloading on illusion and the clap. Those who do it in Pattaya tend to meet FINAL REALITY. Like this:

http://www.pattayacitynews.net/
news_03_02_50_4.htm

man says:

I think we should try to catch the guy who made this film. Filming without the consent of the people should be punished with a severe kick in the balls.

Prufrock says:

Road: Carrie's not funny.

Carrie says:

Oooooooooh, nutzi, nutzi, nutzi...... really, is that the best you can come up with? Sooooooo lame and sooooo gay.....,but that is what us Mango Saucers come to expect with the little Nazi homo, poor abused little psycho. We all love you really Nutzi boy, truly we do, we know how hard it was for you to be fucked by Daddy, molested by Mommy and beaten by big sister and schoolmates. We feel your pain...and we are happy to expand on that and beat the fuck out of your gay fuckin ass you psycho shithead. Oh, and Keithy, why are you calling yourself Ron????? WTF???

Zobby says:

I am terrified!!!!!!!!
I never knew Keith was a Ninja. I would nvere have dissed him if I had known this was the case! Sorry Keith YOUR HIGHNESS, YOUR MAJESTY YOUR FUCKING STUPID CUNT!!!!!! You gotta know you fucking finished in the Kingdom asshole. What?? You don't know it??? Oh boy, better start figuring it out Summers.

thai says:

fucking hate farang!!

Prufrock says:

Common Sense: We've not heard much from you lately on these boards. (I use "we" collectively and in no way pretend to great station) Busy?

Believe it or not I am interested in knowing how you are doing back in the US. (straight)

As for Thailand here, things run hot and cold,work is starting to get interesting but interest in the nightlife thing just kind of bounces around like a roulette-wheel pea.

Sometimes you get a fun evening but with the rascals getting lazier and lazier about a lot of things as the hot season comes on, there has been a definite slide in all aspects.
The biggest single shift of parameters aside from their use of digital technology has been a disturbing FLOOD of the girls' odious, sloth-like, reptilian, pimp-like "brothers, cousins, uncles", and Thai men in general into the P4P areas.
These assholes, formerly lurking in the shadows, now openly insinuate themselves right into the bars and the general scene. An obvious barometer of this situation might be the aggressivity with which the mo-sigh taxis SPEED up and down soi Cowboy. As a long time resident of this town I interpret it as a direct indication of their attitude that they OWN the f*cking soi and they rule the bitches in the bars and that a smashed up punter is so much grist for their mill.
The owners do little to discourage it.
This, in conjunction with a decided decline in the quality on offer, manners (yes MANNERS) and general attitude of these women has led me to believe that the internet is probably a better place to cruise for loose action.
That and the regular gals. Yep. the average office hottie has had a good look at what they can get from a foreign swain in terms of attention, travel and comforts and from what I can see , Common, they are definitely UP for it.
Just reporting a change in the , uh, weather.
A BIG change as far as I can see.

Common Sense says:

not a fan,
Hell no you can't get an "AMEN". You should be proud of your whoremongering ways and allow the world to see. The worst that can happen is that your fat assed wife finds out and you get creamed in a divorce. Even that has benefits such as being able to carry on with your whoring unimpeded by the guilt of a misses back home thinking your in Bangkok "closing the deal".

Dump the shame and join the masses of shameless whoremongers who make Thailand such a great place.

dingdongrb says:

"......has led me to believe that the internet is probably a better place to cruise for loose action."

Please Pru don't tell me you're moving up in the wonderful land of smiles..... lmfao....... :-)

Common Sense says:

Prufrock,
Sucks to hear about the change in weather in Thailand. I was planning on taking a trip there this summer. Luckily I kept the numbers to some of my favorites. I prefer to shack up with a regular at night and hit up a soapy or two in the day or early evening while cruising for some quality pickings. If nothing of interest presents itself I just go with the tried and true.

As far as using the internet, go for it. That's space age pimping as far as I'm concerned. I think half the hotties in Thailand are on Myspace nowadays. You can tell the working girls by the number of foreigners they have in their pics. Always at least one or two mules pictured in there just to keep up appearances of being their "good Thai girl".

I'm doing rather well here, just been busier than a Pattaya hooker when the 3rd Marine Division is in town. I doubled up on my college courses so I can finish my degree by mid to late summer, which makes it nearly unbearable to spend any more time than necessary at the computer. This is mainly why I haven't been posting as regularly.

I've got a few job offers that I need to make a decision on sometime this week. I'm also starting a side business which required me to get a few licenses in the last month. More boring fucking classwork.

The quality of women in farangland is still shitty. Well the accompanying attitude anyways, looks wise there are still some hotties around. Went out with a young pre-school teacher the other day. About 2 minutes into the date I was regretting that choice. Dumb bitch talked and talked about relationships, family, and children half the damned night like I gave a shit (I'm ever the proud whoremonger). In order to make the evening pass by bearibly I drank myself stupid since miss goody two shoes didn't drink and I had a designated driver. Anyways get back to her place and I was just going to drive home since this had seemed like a hopeless waste of a night, but she insisted I stay since I was in no condition to drive. Next thing I know were in the sack and she's doing things even the dirtiest Thai whore wouldn't do for a 10,000 Baht tip. After seeing that side of her I can't believe they even let her around children let alone teach. After such a long stay outside of the US, this served as a reminder that even the most seasoned Thai hooker is rarely as slutty as the average farang woman.

chris says:

thai authourties are on to this man as we speak.they think its giving thailand a bad reputation looking like bkk has hookers!

Prufrock says:

Common Sense: Yeah. Knock off that degree whatever ya do. This place is currently full of guys who are wishing they had done just that.

How 'bout some feedback from others on the scene here. Is it just me or has the detectable drop in what's on offer in P4P joints been offset by an appreciable rise in
BTS flirtations ? Outright invitations?
Bank teller> Kaaaaaa - ings
Shop girl > warnings regarding bar-girls coupled with the information that THEY (however) get off at six. "blink blink"
"Student" > Blouse-button misalignments and skirt slittings and ever more intriguing footwear
Baumrungrad Greeting girls > Offering more help than anyone could possibly require in finding a patient's room
Hair cutting gals > Using their newly firmed or siliconed implants to massage your neck while they giggle about trim your nose-hairs (which you, ah, trim every day?
Random "sidlings up" at various retail locations, Starbucks (Langsuan) and the Kinokunya?

Never one for simple answers as you well know CS, I just reckon it's the "seafood thing.
And the income stream thing ;-)
Life's a bitch.

Dana says:

Attn: Dicer

As usual your writing is riveting but not compelling. My happinesse will always trump your intelligence. I find the farang nightlife scene fun. It makes me smile. Coupling with or spending time with or smiling with attractive females is something I like to do. I get to do that in Thailand. Your long post triggered by an opinion of mine is skilled at presenting the negatives of my opinion. But you offer no alternative.

Are you suggesting that I stay in Boston and date 58 year old fat stupid angry feminists? Are you insane? I find the late night lobby denizens and behaviors of the Nana Hotel to be fun and funny and interesting. I don't care what you think. My only regret is that I can not do more of it. A lot more of it. And preferably right in front of you. As you sink to your knees in a self induced overly intellectual apoplectic fit neither myself nor the equally shallow woman I am with will notice. You do not count.

Road Natzi says:

CS,

You crack me up. Doesnt it just amuse the shit out of you when some 'farang' slut turns it on for free, yet at the same time would knock the thai girls doing it for 1000 baht.

I hope you nailed her.

At least when ur finished in the Marines you can slide over to Thailand whenever you so desire and for however long.

Pity you don't have a video of the school teach slut to copy and sell to pay for your trip to thailand (not that I want to see ur big white arse going up and down).

Common Sense says:

Road Natzi,
I'll work on the video. Even though she was a prudish bore outside the bedroom, her antics inside the bedroom warrant a few more unbearable nights of suffering through bullshit just to get to the good stuff. I highly doubt I'll even need to hide the cam. Oh and don't worry, my ass isn't big although the whiteness might blind you.

ozricdan says:

It’s true that people don’t like being filmed but the guy who threw his glasses at me and told me to be careful with that camera needs to take it easy it was only 1pm and hardly anything was happening. I wonder what would happen if I had filmed the beer garden on soi 7 around that time as there are some strange peeps in there during the daytime.

This is the video I shot...... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4perbm3FvU

At 25 secs in you can just, see this man throw his glasses at me then he goes out of shot but you can hear what he says.

Road Natzi says:

CS,

Perhaps you could do her on the bonnet of her car (dont want to damage yours) and we can all watch on GOOGLE EARTH.

You will hear us cheering you on from above.

Prufrock chanting. "My turn"

Prufrock says:

Geez, I dunno Road. This young school marm sounds an awful lot like marriage material and this is all beginning to sound too much like lu-urve.
Did I hear soemebody say, like, "band camp"?
And Google Earth ?! Oh yeah!!

Prufrock

Dicer says:

Attentive Dana,

I don't have to count and I don't have to provide alternatives and I'm not being instructive. What I am doing is painting your REALITY FONDUE.

In case you missed it this was the thrust of my post:

"Let's say deprivation, capitalism, fuzzy neo-pagan liberal ideas and alienation lead more men into the habit of flying 5000 miles for the Nana march.

The criticism:

"But no point in romanticising a paid-for lowlife meat parade as a "discreet and proud" show of talent. That would simply be to expect the pretend rice hookers to adjust to your distorted view of them. "

And the caveat:

"you are smart and enjoy it."

At the end of the day it is all illusion overload and yes we all need it. You should in fact do it more often. But little chance of doing it in front of me I'm afraid. Incidentally, this reminds me. In one amusing episode Borat tells us that that he suffered a nasty gypsy attack in his youth in which his missus and plough were stolen and they touched his horse in a pervy way; He was then determined to continue working as a gypsy catcher, bragging that he can hit a gypsy with a rock from fifteen meters away if chained—less if not. I sent him an email berating not so much his attitude towards gypsies - which would be pointless - but the occupational hazards of working as a gypsy catcher considering the long term financial prospects of that trade.

He angrily replied in the same manner you did. In fact I just compared the replies and he said the exact same thing you said with the exception of a few words:

"As you sink to your knees in a self induced overly intellectual apoplectic fit neither myself nor the equally shallow gypsies I catch with will notice. You do not count."

Of course he said it in a Kazakh accent.

What did I do? I sent him a reply. I thought about adding here the Borat reply here but decided to actually add a post I prepared just for you:

Dana says:

Hello Dicer:

As usual thank-you for your time and attention. And as usual you miss the main thrust (and thrusting) of life. We are all going to die. It is not the man with the most things at the end that wins. It is the man with the most smiles at the end that wins. It matters not the source of the smiles and your contribution to someone else's smile pile is zero. I smile at women of the non-approved Dicer kind in Thailand and they smile back. I like this. I intend to keep doing it. You have zero currency with me on this issue. I could use up a lot of energy making judgements about every non-Dicer approved man and woman in the Kingdom but I choose instead to concentrate on smiling and laughing. You should leave the dark side of useless and unfriendly intellectualism and come over to the frivolous side of muttonheads and low achievers and the non-reflective and the chronically poor choice makers and the superficial. You'll smile more.

Common Sense says:

Dicer,
Iwill have to say that Dana (all ladyboy loveing aside) is making much more sense here. Fcuk all the ins, outs, and historical bullshit that makes the whores of thailand whores, and the whoremongers of thailand whoremongers. As long as we all bust a fat nut and leave with a smile on our face and don't destroy our livelihoods in there process, does it really fuckinng matter.

ps. again for all the language and grammer natsi's . piss off i'm drink. I'm finnnaly a civilian again and celebtrating.

Common Sense says:

more on this larer when i sober up.

Andy says:

Those sea-gypsy types make for cracking shags, me hearties! Just tie 'er to the mizzen mast, and 'oist 'er mainsail, afore ye discharge ye seamen into 'er naval base, afore ye make the scurvy dog walk the plank.... Rrrrrr!!!

Road Natzi says:

Prufrock,

Naaa, Common is a smart man with a bright future in Thailand, I can see him hanging out of a few dozen thai chicks before he returns to the USA and passes on his new VD's to this teacher mole who will in turn reveal that she was born a man.

It's kewl CS, it happens to all of us at one time or another. Also steer away from the teacher type (unless you like to be dominated - BITCH). I have always found Nurses to be the real filthy whores.......don't ya just love being a man !

Dicer says:

Dana,

You seem to be missing something. I've been in Thailand for some time. I've scoured the dingy and seedy parts of bkk long before it became the staple diet of the entire string section of the Boston Philharmonic.

You on the other hand are the eternal tourist. You live in your manicured and symmetrical environment in the US supplemented by the regular LOS trip to wag and dip your end in the little boxes. Which is good...repeat good. And I can see why once you get here you'd want to rush to Nana or Pattaya Soi 7-8 (more amusing) to ...to what was that you said, "smile at women of the non-approved Dicer kind ...and [as] they smile back concentrate [more] on smiling and laughing." That sounds like a euphemism for renting a tart and shagging her. Good for you. "Approval" is the wrong word by the way. I'm a (and not, the) detached observer after all. Not directly inhaling from the neural and hydraulic sexual effluvia of the throngs that queue up at the Angel disco I make running commentary about a place I know is there without actually being there. If I had to go regularly and do what you intend to do and report on that - like many of the Donna Summers and Dean Barretts are wont to do - my commentary would probably have merged with a twisted form of internal dissent and become a torrent of dysentery.

There was a time when I used to smirk and smile and guffaw and sneer and snarl and chuckle and grunt and groan at the sight of mindless little mutant tarts that shuffled their flat parabolic feet on the soi Nana sidewalk. Now when I have 15 ethnic groups and the exquisite females they produce up here in the mountains - not to mention sea gypsies - why need I bother to partake in the existential equivalent of a face contest at the Nana disco. Once you stay in Thailand for a while the mutant tarts start to fade off as little mindless romanticised minxes and are simply semblable (or should I say similar-dissimilar sneering boxes.) If you talked about screwing them I'll nod at THAT constant urge to release. But call them "proud and discreet" or whatever they are not, then that actually would make me smile and further incite me to drop the sort of comments I did above precisely because proud and discreet they are not. If you insist that they are then fine. Let's just say, that is when illusion becomes delusion. Or more accurately it is a distortion and nothing else. I'm talking about the perception of the men and not the girls here. Just as you show up here in Thailand to diddle the little yo-yos and once done, the goods sampled, the clapoir bubo contracted and the tip exchanged your distorted view clears up a bit as you catch your flight back home. If it hadn't cleared then perhaps you'd lose your judgment and would perhaps decide to drop your stateside life for the daily whiff of enchanted pussy-tresses. But the fact that you haven't done that so far seems to me you are a few steps ahead in the game and whatever you say here is taken with a grain of salt or shall we say a knowing wink?

Nevertheless I'm sure you can comprehend that anyone not madly elated about the Nana march as much as you are is not necessarily a miserable wanker lacking in fun and humour.

Ok I'll admit it. When I have guests (even family members) arriving for the first time in LOS that corner bar at Nana Hotel or the bar across the road is one of the places I take them. We spend hours doing the pisstake on what happens there, laugh and smirk and giggle and so on and so forth...and we move on to other things. In fact I did that a year ago with my old man who to my amusement likened it to the brothel-promenade of Pompeii. Later on the vision of being fossilised by volcanic ash as we guffawed while imbibing Tiger Beer at a Nana bar jolted me to pay up and lead my elderly but fun loving father to our appointed hotel. The prospect of appearing as a museum object 2 millennia from now like the poor unsuspecting punters in Pompeii was thrilling though. Anyway I digress.

"You should leave the dark side of useless and unfriendly intellectualism and come over to the frivolous side of muttonheads" - Dana

Perfect invitation...before though I must add one thing... as far as the whole phenomenon of creating a picturesque and agreeably smiling little people in far off places is concerned - whether for the long time resident or the short time tourist - this is something I said in 2004 and three years on it still holds true:

-------------------------------------
"[For the western visitor] colonial control, or at least the desire of conquest, usually finds a need for childlike natives; something a lot of people tend to suffer from. [Sex with puny Asian girls or in times past say rednecks who raped their black slaves or Brits who did it with Maasai ladies is simply a solvent in the greater scheme of things]...and all this talk [smiling nonstop like an idiot notwithstanding] can be hijacked to that purpose. [Why, when you romanticise or worse even sentimentalise these pretend village-tennis-sex providers you are simply adding a sweet and sickly pallour to their already bleached faces.] The only conquest that occurs in Thailand is that we knob their girls. Now conquest this certainly is, because, like some here say, it is our only foray into the little people but even this dalliance with the exotic birds is short lived and often turns on itself once the pleasant prurience loses impact. [As countless stories here on MS show] The "sullen" foreigner starts finding faults with the local girl and through her with the place or the people. What foreign men profess not to like about Thailand often comes out as criticism of the women as strange, a bit childish and always untrustworthy. [I know you are revving about the childlike quality they have.] And the reverse is true too. If we think about it at all, we cannot but realise that we are regarded as unreal, as ciphers by [them]. And we endlessly pitch our innocuous mockeries at each other; we zero weight nonentities to their picturesque mindless "little people."

"No more than I might expect the mamasan to say after services rendered [not in Nana disco of course] by one of her bints bye and good riddance would anyone exclaim, stepping from the culture just surveyed as one might shed a pair of dirty pants, how shitty their lives are because, even if the Thais were impoverished, afflicted with this illness or that ignorance, even if they were speedily dying off still any tourist [like you Dana] could observe how they smiled, or how they are hospitable, what nice tits the girls have or how good shags they are. We can envy them their peaceful ways and their food; The point is all of us can be mollified, having found that there was some functional point to [all], and if we still felt morally squeamish about the number of ladyboys in the country [which I guess you don't] or insect eating or overflowing sewers it is clear we were still squeezed into a narrow Western point of view, and had no sympathy at all, and did not understand. We are just some insensitive Hyperboreans who try to beat out the truth, could but never get it. "

Posted by Dicer | August 11, 2004 2:07 AM
---------------------------------------

Now back to your invitation. Time for fun and merriment.....

Craig says:

Dicer,
I can’t speak for others but to travel 5000 miles to score a smiling shaven rice farmer is not a bad deal if you have been to some of the former hot spots in the America’s we have messed up. Being taken for your money with a smile is far better than the Tica cock gobbler drinking all my rum while putting her cigarettes out on the cum stained carpet in my $100 a night hot sheet.
Or having to watch the Columbian Princess taking a shower in her underwear because that is laundry method in barrio bajo.
Trust me when I say Naana is a picnic compared to some places. I will concede Nanna is low on Thai standards. I prefer Pattaya. Of course there are a lot of accidents but since I never bought a condo my odds have not worsened.
These girls are the same wherever I go. A girl that would sell her ass would sell any excited mutant down the road for the price of a bowl of noodles.
I have an advantage in Thailand. I do not understand the Thai language. I do not care about whore philosophy and it is great not to have to hear it. Smile bitch, suck me and get out……no rum…..it make you porn pui.
It is so great not to have the conversation on “today my birthday, handsome man.” Or having to deal with Spanish foreplay, room service. It is certainly great not to expect the hotel manger at the end of the visit to view the opportunity as hotel remodel time.
Whether in Nanna or any place the subtle glances from one girl to another mean nothing more than “I boom boom more than you heheh”. One thing that is also universal is the lying about the financial gain bestowed to them by their new love. Never have figured that one out. I guess to suck cock for $15 is better than $14 who knows. Logic is based upon local values and priorities. This always brings a smile to this geezer. They have it worked out in their heads that the difference in that one dollar is the difference in their virtues
It has been sometime since you were in Mexico. The police robbed me for $150 last week. Right in front of the Embassy and only 40 yards from US Immigration. The 4 had no smile when they (for no reason) lighten my pockets. I felt good about it so they left me with half my money.
I don’t know if you read that last month the Mexican Government disarmed the police in TJ because they were involved in “too many” murders. They gave them sling shots to use until ballistics could be run on their guns. Well the guns started filtering back when they got me.
Last year when the customs police in Bangkok helped themselves to $1000 form me bringing in to many cigarettes (for personal use) they had the mindful duty to smile at me when they told me I smoked too much and I was a bad influence on Thai sensibilities.
The smile meant so much.
Let’s face it that the smiling brown Princesses look good as well. I went over to Mexico to get fucked and I got fucked although it was not by the girls. I studied them and studied them and felt sorry for the poor creatures on how God had passed over the lot of them. Girls from Southern Mexico are good looking but the unfortunates from the North are from the classic beaner stock. Everywhere the have pretty girls but in some places their shelf life is no longer than that of a strawberry.

Dana says:

Dicer Dicer Dicer . . . so much to teach you; so little time. Since you are determined to be smarter than me rather than as happy as me; perhaps we can discuss something tangential to the topic: to wit--mileage.

If I travel five miles from my home to meet a smiling woman who I can spend adult time with I am a regular guy. If I travel 10,000 miles from my home to do the same thing I am now an oppressor and a monger. Apparently, the extra 9,995 miles means something because I went from a normal male to a social-political criminal. How did that happen? How does that happen Mr. Dicer?

Even when I was young, and foolish, and anxious for people to think I was smart, and on point regarding every politically correct notion; this idea had no legs. It is ridiculous. But like many other ideas of no currency it can not be killed. You can not drive a stake into this notion with logic or reason. But I still can not figure it's enormous appeal.

Perhaps you can help explain this idea to us on Mangosauce Mr. Dicer. And while you are at it perhaps as a courtesy to the rest of us heathens you could tells us what the mileage demarcation line is. When do I go from socially acceptable guy to monger and criminal from an oppressing society? Is it at the 20 mile mark or the 200 mile mark or the 1500 mile mark away from home? I figure you will know this. How far am I permitted to travel from home for the purpose of smiling before I have gone to far? The world awaits your answer Mr. Dicer.

Dicer says:

Dana,

What you say about mileage is absolutely correct. It is ridiculous. What I'm on about most of the time - in fact all of the time - is about UNDERSTANDING OTHER PEOPLES REALITY. It is not the travel to far off places that is the problem; it’s the inability to grasp their world view. As I keep asking: "Is everywhere Ohio?" With that said rest assured that I'm reasonably happy and am sure you have lots to teach all of us here.

Circumnavigating the globe for sex can be an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of the best.

dingdongrb says:

Did someone say "Ohio"?

Cleveland Rock!!!!

Dana says:

"What I'm on about most of the time - in fact all of the time - is about UNDERSTANDING OTHER PEOPLES REALITY. It is not the travel to far off places that is the problem; it’s the inability to grasp their world view."

Mr Dicer: you are correct and you are consistant and you get an A in the 'Know Thyself' contest. But what you are not equally skilled at is why I have to care about,or get involved in, r be cognizant of,or be sensitive to someone else's worldview. On what remote known only to Dicer 10,000 foot plinth of pure quartz is this chiseled? In which spiral arm of the Torndule galaxy is there a planet with this immutable law of physics secreted in it's leaden core? In short: where do you come up with this nonsense?

I don't have to be sensitive to anyone's needs or worldview. A poorer emotional return on invested energy would be hard to imagine. It's all about me Mr. Dicer. Me from start to finish and any beating hearts that impact on me are going to be of the ricochetng kind, not the napalm kind. Me Me Me Mr. Dicer which makes me one of the Alphas because I have not lost touch with the center and the core of what it means to exchange oxygen and carbon dioxide in a carbon based organism on an insignificant rock hurtling throught an indifferent space towards an unrecorded future. There is no other person in my bone marrow but mine and that fact trumps all other social theories about how we should be sensitive to other people's needs. You want to be one of the chosen ones Mr. Dicer by being one of the 'good' civilized people but your desire to be well thought of blinds you to the real realities.

The real reality is that every woman judges every man by his silouette on the horizon and the only thing she values is his height. His height symbolizes his strength and his ability to predate and to kill and to conquer and to rape her and to protect her. She does not feel like a woman unless she feels like a child. The real reality Mr. Dicer is that mating and lusting and loving and parenting and all of the rest that triggers society is based on womenchoosingmenwhoarethe best killers and rapists and predators. That is reality Mr. Dicer and the women know it.

So when you are being sensitive and caring and loving and civilized in your northern Thai mountains the local women are just laughing at you. You have no currency with them unless they feel threatened by a man who can bludgeon and instill fear and take what he wants when he wants. For that man they will line up to bend over and be impregnated. They will fight amoungst themselves to be beaten and disrespected by that man because evolution has taught them that it ishis semen that has the most value. What good is a son if he can not kill to protect his mother? That is the reality of the world Mr. Dicer and that is what you want me to be sensitive to? Well, I am sensitive to it Mr. Dicer--I know more about this than you do.

World View? You dare to pontificate about world view? You don't know anything about world view if you can not extemporaneously lecture on war and blood and revenge and violence and killing and predation; all activities endorsed and sponsored and calculated and supported by woman who use stupid men to serve their needs. Men telling other men on the net to be sensitive to other people's world view? Women are laughing at you Mr. Dicer. Their world view of you is that you have so little value as a man that you are not even worth killing for sport. That is their world view.

Dicer says:

The ME ONLY world is in terms of cognitive evolution somewhere between that of a Gila Monster and a skunk written with the ink of cuttlefish. Whatever meds you are on Dana it is making you envision a world where only your ejaculatory thoughts count. Hope you arrive in Thailand quickly and undo the spiggot. Anyway your rant about killing and maiming a la alpha uber male would have made the syphilitic Fred Neitzsche very proud except here it's put in very crude terms.

"your desire to be well thought of blinds you to the real realities. " - Dana

Well thought of by whom? The mindless little mutant tarts or the psychotic misfit foreigners who saunter around the place? Please. Or you mean the MS denizens...?

"r be cognizant of,or be sensitive to someone else's worldview....I don't have to be sensitive to anyone's needs or worldview...when you are being sensitive and caring and loving and civilized in your northern Thai mountains the local women are just laughing at you.. World View? You dare to pontificate about world view? You don't know anything about world view if you can not extemporaneously lecture on war and blood and revenge and violence and killing and predation.....That is the reality of the world Mr. Dicer and that is what you want me to be sensitive to? " - Dana

I'm afraid you completely misread me and you need to calm down a bit. I couldn't give two hoots about sensitivity to others needs. But I am in the business of wanting to know how and what others think and what they believe. Other people's (other countries) reality is something worth knowing. It's part language part culture. And this is not for academic purposes but for my own self preservation and to get good results in what I do. The problem with some is that they bring their own crap from wherever and superimpose that on top of the people here. Whether at Nana disco or Sadr City it is exactly the same. When you superimpose your reality on others you and your psychotic ways are bound to fail. It never works. A little mindless village tart ends up cleaning out the Swiss neurosurgeon. Or the daft Issan hooker turned gf has her Pattaya farang do a Houdini from a 10th floor balcony with hands tied and head in celophane. Scoff at the little people and you can find out what happens.

You of all people should know that as I believe you have been writing about it for long. Grasping the reality of dealing with mutant tarts from other places goes beyond your money and savage uber muscle, which although is your power can never negate the fact that dealing with Other people in other countries is fraught with dangers and pitfalls. Or is the nuance here lost on you? You are parroting about mileage and numbers and pillage and so on.

As for the alpha male syndrome I've said more than enough on the subject before, but since you are roaring in your ME ONLY kinesthetic frame of mind here is a little morning tunic from the past. Since I like to repeat myself and you like to read it just the way you want to read it here, read and weep or is it weed and reap?

On the strong alpha male being the winner:
-----------------------------------

In Asia with a lot of harmonic auditory people in place you also have a lot of peasant culture that is very gender based and rules about what males and females do ( you are told not to do dishes, sweep the floor or laundry). One filthy rich bkk Chinese lady I knew had an alpha lower income husband that got the whole family in line...marched in first at the restaurants and barked out where all were to sit. She loved and admired this. So at peasant level you need a semblance of alpha behaviour. If you come creeping in on your belly, you are going to be in trouble and ditto for any peasant society. In macho countries like Spain, Mexico or even Japan and Korea no female would get near you, but in LOS the calmer energy gives way to the smile cringe stuff and you think you can pull the "Heck call me fatty hyuk hyuk." It's interesting that the Japanese who get a lifetime training on roles already have a plan when they get a local tart and the girls love the structure filling up their void lives, no sneers and no disrespect.

On your dominant western males failing in Thailand:
----------------------------------

I wondered why dominant males respond poorly to calm assertiveness...and it occurred to me that it can be switched to balance for an experiment. I never factored in animal behaviour...now i can see it ...it is all right there... you see the gin muu guys (let's eat the pig type of farangs) with sloppy posture, dopey hair, slave status being carved up by idiot women. Observation is not the only thing...in addition to right posture, right mind and right action there is interaction to bring locals into balance. This will turn out being pretty easy as they try to be balanced in their own group and it is the area of non pack where they have problems: MEETING AN ALIEN. Actually in pack terms they have such a slick first encounter system that foreigners live here 20 years and don't have a clue what locals are up to. It's like the Dog Whisperer teaching his pack to always wag their tails at any dog they meet, but then run back and hide somewhere and on the second meeting, show their teeth. But one time is so unique on this planet that most people are fooled. Mutants aren't and are ready to show their teeth.

On foreigner's losing the plot:
--------------------------------

[Living in Thailand is like] living in a female pack society and farangs becoming or always being a compendium of cartoon faux pas guaranteed to melt your face. These idiots have a check list of all the things to lose face and be stomped on! Why is it that whimpering (or hulking) Saxons think they can go to a mutant peasant society and get away with it all. Isn't it all about rules?

Thais have orchestrated conflict avoidance to a peak...the small talk exchange when making a purchase...smooth flow between strangers. However this avoidance thing is put to a test when the customer returns and now the store person goes into anxiety or the saxon decides to marry the smiling village tart... in general conversation they avoid serious topics. Such topics could reveal real points of view so better to avoid, talk about prices or beauty contests...[ or smile and giggle till you drop] as a result you have a completely non thinking populace...no exchange of ideas out of fear. And then you get sucked into the arch-illusive sewer, the one that lulls you into thinking that you're a-OK, and everything is going to be nice with your village tart. Really? Well here we go? When are these f morons going to wake up and smell the coffee. The sao is JUST LEASED OUT so that they can hook or do anything they like as long as the cash flows. So we are talking a female pack. They have ensured their territory with laws. And with Sak Dinah they keep non pack officially out and not even get a respect name. This pack uses and manipulates to keep non pack at bay. No wai, and all the cheating is largely a message YOU ARE NOT WANTED...wrong territory, but instead of throwing spears, it is done in the subtle female way, cheat all the time, negative and defensive, and the all pervasive sneer, the comment behind your back, using language and gesture to create an invisible but recognized boundary. The classic is the wife still calling the husband "it" (munn) to the maid and kids. There is no idealism in the "me only" & "me first" world so where are the lines between human and animal?

This is really just a more synthetic recognition of animal behaviour. It is saying that animals have something in common, whereas the relativist point of view is a less developed point of view that the hyena is completely different from the jackal, a lack of awareness and stays stagnant on the idea that power is the basic element....Enter a million ways to trap this male and get "it" subsurvient. As dogs have to be socialised to figure out their own animal behaviour the same holds true for humans, pack animals need training.

So the question is as one pokes around Thailand what is the mind doing? The difference between [the losers and winners] is [the winners] are 100% on target aware of self being leader. The others are wondering where the shampoo aisle is.....the usual nice guy persona of the farang just does not go over anywhere especially in a peasant society. The clues are right there. Tiny beasts trying to shove you around. Imagine what the mutants would do to them. The more I hear about whimpering Saxon misfits being ripped off by village mutants the more the focus concentrates on the problems of foreigners who are projecting onto their village tarts....

-------------------------------

Now all this highlights certain constant - and resounding - themes like the inability to go beyond the smile and the stasis of a ME ONLY world. Both of which can lead one right into the sewer vortex.

Pants Elk says:

Dicer to aisle three, please! Spillage in aisle three!

altoid says:

Sigh,

It appears now that Thailand is censoring parts of youtube now. If you click the youtube link in Thailand (if you're not on a proxy) you'll see a lovely picture of the King and Queen. I've also found that most of the coup comments and footage are not loading either.

Can we get the scoop on this?

Dicer says:

Pants Elk says: "Dicer to aisle three, please! Spillage in aisle three!"

Pants as you know Dana gives 50 baht to every maid, housekeeper and janitor he meets in Thailand. So I made the release spiggot comment with the confidence that he has several people queuing up to clean the mess. It is not his hydraulic byproducts nor his Nana comment that I consider ultimately interesting but this comment here:

"Me from start to finish and any beating hearts that impact on me are going to be of the ricochetng kind, not the napalm kind. Me Me Me Mr. Dicer which makes me one of the Alphas because I have not lost touch with the center and the core of what it means to exchange oxygen and carbon dioxide in a carbon based organism on an insignificant rock hurtling throught an indifferent space towards an unrecorded future. There is no other person in my bone marrow but mine and that fact trumps all other social theories " - Dana

Come to think of it this really is about people lost in dysfunctional ME ONLY lives. ME ONLY people are extra lost and take more time to figure it out. Now I don't mind what people do...but I don't like it when people who are 1 cm from therapy start trying to act superior...this I don't like....

Since he has opened a can of worms the full Dicer caravan will arrive shortly.

TANAI KWAI says:

Craig writes,

"Being taken for your money with a smile is far better than the Tica cock gobbler drinking all my rum while putting her cigarettes out on the cum stained carpet in my $100 a night hot sheet.

Or having to watch the Columbian Princess taking a shower in her underwear because that is laundry method in barrio bajo...."

What a sickening and depressing portrait you paint. Can't relate at all.

If you can't have fun trolling the Blue Marlin in San Jose... I don't know what to tell you. Just what kind of low-rent girls are you pulling, anyway? Do you look like Bob Hoskins or something?

Just stay across the park at the Holiday Inn. It's about as good as the Landmark, and quite pleasant and sanitary.

Colombian girls, btw, are utterly enchanting. (They are the Vietnamese equivalent in the Americas, if that registers.) Love the way they speak. Ticas are also a breath of fresh air.

(Or so I've heard.)

Actually, I've promised to take my TGF to Quepos this year. Fun beach. And great national parks.

I'm sure you've noticed that the flag of Costa Rica looks almost exactly like the Thai flag.

David,

Like the names up top. Well done.

Dicer says:

"You dare to pontificate about world view?" - Dana

Not quite from the office of the pontiff but regardless here I go ecclesiastical... psychoficate about your state of mind as revealed from your words..... Although I'm semi-retired from the rebuttal market here is to indulging you. And there is even a recommendation at the end.

----A MOCUMENTARY IN FOUR EPISODERS-----

EPISODE 1

DANA'S ME ONLY WORLD IN LATENT RETRO-PSYCHIATRY

A clearer and exact definition of bonding in psychology that was in vogue in the 70s.... when you think of bonding think of the inner self at work.. How? Search for a negative bonding pattern... Here is a hypothetical situation with Dana telling his shrink about his missus. While Dana screams animal power, ectoplasm and savage magnetism all he is doing here is nothing more than projecting his own inner uneasiness on mangosaucers. Let us explore his psyche a bit. One could simply suggest that it's perhaps medically sound to have periodic checkups. Or envisage a situation where his shrink toys with him... Here is a scene, Dana enters shrinks office, rests on couch....it is late afternoon.

Dana: So what do you think doctor?
Doctor: Dana, you are like a character in Greek mythology who's half-goat.
Dana: I have a lot of animal vibration to give off. Can you sense it?
Doctor: hmm..naa....naa....
Dana: hmm maybe the acoustics of this office...I find it a bit stuffy...You know in Thailand everything is open air.
Doctor: I see...so what do you do when you go to Thailand.
Dana: Oh it's amazing.... you know last time I met this cute smiling girl at the Nana Disco
Doctor: That is in Bangkok is it?
Dana: yes.... and I said to her Pink Sea Weed...her perfume of course...you know what she said...she said that was exactly right. She was amazed. You see it was a special perfume only found in Japan. Her Japanese customer bought it for her.
Doctor: (rolling his eyes) I see....and
Dana: and she said Hugo Boss 1996... which was amazing....coz that's the scent I was wearing....
Doctor: aah an olfactory lust made in....
Dana: Of course I immediately told her that when we recognise each other's smells where I come from in the animal, we have to go fuck. And you know what? she was happy...she gave me 500 baht discount...
Doctor: (taking notes) fascinating.... could we come back to your bonding problem with your wife...
Dana: oh sorry yes she.... this is what happened

THE WIFE'S CONTROLLING MOTHER SELF AND DANA'S INNER CHILD

Dana: My wife arrived home yesterday and made a comment as she came through the door. The place looked a bit messy as I had just finished an afternoon fixing her car and was feeling rather good about how much I'd achieved. Now I'd been looking forward to her return and then telling her about the car and accepting her appreciation. But instead she complained that I left the place messy ... which it was.

Doctor: This means you're in a vulnerable state with few boundaries. Her comment sounds to you like a ‘critical parent’. You feel judged and blamed for not having moved all the car parts and tools out of the kitchen before she arrived home and that triggers your underlying vulnerability.
Dana: I told myself "If the house is a mess it’s my fault."
Doctor: You react by feeling more like a guilty child. Of course, what you think you hear may not be what she meant, but once you are triggered your unbalanced core beliefs take over and you tell yourself, "She doesn’t appreciate me, I’m being rejected and it’s my fault." In any case, your reaction (‘guilty un-appreciated child’) is quickly replaced as you loop into one of your own one-above ‘parent’ selves. This self takes over and directs stronger blame, anger and criticism towards her (and also help you stop feeling guilty and therefore less vulnerable).

Dana: And then I said, "I've just spent all day fixing your car and that's the thanks I get from you!".
Doctor: You see Dana attacking the wife like this makes you feel more like a strong parent again. Your critical father's attack self helps protect your vulnerable ‘child’ so you feel better. It’s a natural process and we all do it.
Dana: What do you mean?
Doctor: Initially your ‘angry father’ energy is a little more powerful than her original ‘critical parent’. Her inner critic beats her up and tells her how ungrateful she was when you have been working all day on her car. This pulls her down into the guilty child position. So what happened?
Dana: My wife burst into tears "Oh Dana that was so selfish of me. I am a rotten person. What can I do to make it up to you?"
Doctor: No! She didn't say that did she?
Dana: No...I'm just kidding...we got into an argument.
Doctor: Ahh that’s more like it...you has me worried there for a second.... You see Uncle Sigmund says that the wife can't stay in vulnerability. So it’s the turn of one of her even stronger ‘parent’ one-above selves to join in and to protect her. Her judgmental parent self might tell your wife she must fight back against your bullying control (this helps to stop her feeling guilty). This makes her seem to you more like a powerful parent and you react to her strong comment by feeling like an unloved child.
Dana: Yes I felt hurt.
Doctor: Her selves were only doing this to protect her ‘vulnerable child’ but since they are so strong the effect is to throw you back into the weaker child position...and you know what her protector selves are going to do about that! When you are in a ‘child’ or one-below energy state that you feel like ‘poor me - I’m unloved’ this is the same time as the wife is in the opposite energy state of ‘blaming critical parent’. The flip side is when both of you change over so you become 'judging father' and she is 'guilty child'. Repeating this again and again, sets the stage for a long term enmeshed relationship made up of almost continual bondings with occasional breaks when both of you tell yourselves 'we are having a good day". In fact it may be that you may have only moved into a short term positive bonding pattern.
Dana: None of this means anything to me...what do I do next?

DANA IN A SPIRAL

(Doctor opens a manual and reads.....)

Once negative bonding is established it gains more energy with each round. But understanding bonding patterns and getting out of them takes more than analysing the details of the pattern as we have done here. It is humanly impossible to 'solve' or 'resolve' any one individual bonding pattern so spending time on this is futile. Analysing details from one pattern above is wasting time. What does help is to notice the ways in which every pattern the same person does is the same, only the details change.

Doctor: You did one pattern with her before breakfast and another one afterwards, got to work and did one with your boss, three with customers, a couple more with colleagues, another with the taxi driver on the way home, was ready for the one we came in on above, as she walked through the door. Meanwhile, since your wife went off this morning, she has had several on the phone with her sister and her colleagues at work, one with the dog and another with her computer. It didn't help that you were not ready for another one when she walked through the door after giving the dog one and was enticed into continuing another one with you...the pattern was ready and it was waiting for her to get back into it.
Dana: So you're saying it’s my fault...
Doctor: No Dana...actually our time is up...I'll see you next week.

EPISODE 2

(As Dana leaves the session the shrink writes on his pad...)

Underlying vulnerability is the issue at the heart of every pattern with Dana. The only value in analysing one particular negative bonding pattern is if it helps Dana and his wife see that the common factor is about each person's underlying vulnerability and see that this is what drives all his patterns. All today's patterns have been focused around her blaming him or being blamed, a point of deep vulnerability for both of them. In future patterns the same vulnerability will re-appear again and again. (thinks: aah this is good... he'll stick around for a while.)

RESULT IS NO RESULT

Let's say Dana spent 20 years in therapy analysing this negative bonding. Finally got fed up got divorced and moved to Thailand. If I was his shrink in the first one with wife and car, I'd say toss her out the door, keep fixing the car and get that ticket for Bangkok...or Bhutan. On the flight over you can "extemporaneously lecture on war and blood and revenge and violence and killing ...endorsed and sponsored and calculated and supported by woman."

Here is an extended scenario: several years before Dana found out about the joys of BKK he was availing himself the services of a local escort agency in the US. He'd call them and they'd send him their choicest hookers. The following is an excerpt from a screenplay of a film supposedly based on the life of Phillip Roth. It could be quite instructive to Dana's situation so let's see what he gets up to....

FUN WITH COOKIE

Knock at the door. Dana opens the door. A busty black prostitute in pink lycra enters.

Cookie: Dana?
Dana: You're Cookie?
Cookie: Cookie Williams. You wanted me here at ten?
Dana: You wanna, shall we get to it?
Cookie: You don't want to talk a little first?
Dana: Talk? Why?
Cookie: Really? Most guys don't like to jump into bed...without talking. They think it's too businesslike.
Dana: Not me. l'm not...They told you that you'd tie me up.
Cookie: Whatever you want! Let's settle the monetary part and then relax.
Dana: Absolutely. You get $200?
Cookie: That's right. So you want me to tie you up?
Dana: Yeah, tie me up. l'd like you to hit me...and give me a blowjob.
Cookie: A blowjob, then you hit you.
Dana: No. Hit me and then the blowjob. lf the order's not right, it's no fun. Tie me up, hit me, give me a blowjob.
Cookie: What should l tie you with?
Dana: The truth is l thought you were going to wear stockings.

cut to half an hour later.......

Dana: Cookie, you’re a definite artist. They should put your lips in the Smithsonian.
Cookie: lt took you awhile. l didn't think you'd make it.
Dana: l was having a little problem focusing. Finally, l got the right fantasy. l thought of a woman l saw on Sixth Avenue...and l coupled her with Svetlana Stalin. lt's the daughter of the dictator. lt worked.
Cookie: [Cookie pointing at several med bottles] What do you take medicine for?
Dana: Me? Depression.
Cookie: What are you depressed about?
Dana: Depressed. Don't you ever get depressed? Doesn't your work get you down?
Cookie: lt's okay. Beats the hell out of waitressing.
Dana: lt's funny. Every hooker l meet says it beats the hell out of waitressing. Waitressing's got to be the worst job in the world. lt's unbelievable.
Cookie: What are you sad about?
Dana: l'm spiritually bankrupt. l'm empty.
Cookie: What do you mean?
Dana: l'm frightened. l got no soul. Know what l mean? See, when l was younger, it was less scary...waiting for Lefty than it is waiting for Godot.
Cookie: You lost me.
Dana: You know that the universe is coming apart? You know what a black hole is?
Cookie: Yeah. That's how l make my living.
Dana: l gotta tell you, a great writer named Sophocles...said it was probably best not to be born at all.
Cookie: Honey, it's a little too late for that.
Dana: l didn't want to come out. They had to come in and get me.
Cookie: You want another blowjob?
Dana: How come?
Cookie: On the house. No charge. Because them pills you takin' sure ain't working.

EPISODE 3

(cut to many years later when Dana finds out there is nothing better than that one trip he took to Thailand...and life has never been the same since... dumps the nagging wife and starts travelling to Thailand several times a year and writes about his experiences on stickman. This is after about a 100 pieces of articles submitted to stickman.... the scene is set in a hotel bedroom. Dana is in the room with Noi, a 22 yo he picked up at the Nana disco.)

KINDERGARTEN NOI

Dana: OK Noi some basic rules here. Number one, switch your cell-phone off.
Noi: Alai wa?
Dana: Mobile phone (pantomimes)...off right now....
Noi: (makes faces and then puts her mobile phone on silent mode)
Dana: And now Noi we take shower
Noi: Ok you go now
Dana: No we take shower together
Noi: Mai Chai...I ai
Dana: come on go (he has unscrewed the toilet doorknob off and Noi doesn't know this so Noi goes to take a shower but he creeps in on her after 5 mins)
Noi: Mai Chai I ai....I ai...
Dana: mai pen rai
Noi: (stops protesting and starts soaping)

cut to half an hour later.......

Dana: Was that OK?
Noi: You take long time..I jeb
Dana: Really?
Noi: farang thaam naan laew
Dana: So what do you like to do?
Noi: (blank look) I go home now...ok?
Dana: Not ok, we had a long time deal
Noi: But tomorrow I go school
Dana: don't worry
Noi (sulking..) my mother go to hospital
Dana: ok come here now and...we do it in the closet....
Dana: Millions of years old, when prehistoric man roamed here naked and savage.... You'd like to see some hairy Neanderthal? His primitive weapon in hand, stalking through the bush like an animal, never dreaming that some day he will be extinct...and we are two savages in the wilderness you and I, my Noi...I hunt my enemies with primitive weapons...and right now will do you uninhibitedly. (He strips off the robe to show a lambskin loincloth and hairy chest)
Noi: oh my god...farang kon baa...(runs for the door but Dana grabs her and does her on the spot.)

As Dana and Noi go at it like Bedouin daggers a voiceover narrates the following in the manner of David Attenborough with the chimps... As the narration continues Dana is seen later at the Nana disco, smiling, laughing and dancing with the tarts.

NEGATIVE BONDING IN THAILAND

Why is it so hard to see a pattern while we are "in it"? Now let’s come to central Thais. Bonding patterns are often characterised by an incredibly high level of 'not seeing' or 'not noticing' on both sides, yet identifying the underlying vulnerability is essential if you are to understand a bonding pattern. What kind of experiences is Dana likely to have in Thailand? If you can stay in awareness long enough to see the primary self driving the pattern as some Western people can do (and separate from it) then see your own underlying vulnerability (and your partner's too) you can get yourself out of the pattern. However for Thais and even most Western people for that matter, if your primary self and the other person’s primary self are both identifying with the ME in each of us it is very hard to get even a clue that we are in the pattern let alone see it clearly. There is no general awareness of it in ME ONLY societies or to a lesser extent in ME FIRST groups. Often if anything is visible it is seen only through the eyes of the primary self which means it may be severely distorted. Primary selves have a habit of stopping us seeing our own vulnerability at any time, they just do it more in a bonding pattern. Part of the difficulty in understanding these patterns is that each bonding pattern involves one of your strongest primary selves interacting in a powerful way with someone else’s primary self to the exclusion of most other selves and adult awareness. You seldom get into a bonding pattern except when a primary self thinks it "is" you. A self in this position has a powerful sense of knowing that what it sees as true and real, must be true and cannot be questioned.

SNEERING MUTANT ACTION

Thai people in general and central Thais in particular who do not have strong primary selves but operate within an unexpressed form of inner selves do not usually get openly out into one to one negative bonding pattern in a very visual and confrontational way. Thais in general don’t. In fact Asians tend to avoid this. However within the inner self they get locked in exactly the same type of "inner primary self" induced negative bonding pattern that is operated as a subterranean cycle of behaviour.

Before we even suggest "negative group bonding patterns" let’s look at a Thai version of a negative bonding pattern more closely.

Let us consider the form of the bonding pattern first. Remember that ANY bonding pattern represents parent/child interactions between two people, rather than interactions between two aware egos. In the Thai case it is a pattern of dependency. That is, dependency that is encouraged but not rewarded from the age of 3 or 4. So unlike western folk who may experience the usual disowned selves when negative bondings become intense Thais are in a permanent state of disowned external primary selves. Generally in psychology disowned selves mirror each other and in return disowned vulnerability is always the trigger for bonding patterns, either positive or negative . When we as individuals are not responsive to our own needs and do not care properly for our own vulnerable inner children, they will attach elsewhere for the care they require. It is as simple as that! In the above example, we can see that you disowned your own vulnerability when Dana suffered a disappointment after his wife's comments. His primary self came to his rescue in order to tackle the situation. As he got into longer cycles of negative bonding with his wife he had totally forgotten he was upset, but although his vulnerability was disowned, it was still operating underneath. His Inner Child was counting on his wife's Good Mother to take care of him but he did not know about this.

EPISODE 4

WHAT WOULD A THAI PERSON DO?

Say Dana new wife is Thai ... had her Chinese boss scream at her before she left work. She got in a negative bonding with him before she left work. Tried to defend herself. She found out that one of the other girls in the office said she had done the work wrongly and she got into another one with that girl. Remember these are cycles that were started long before these specific problems occur. A screaming boss has many entrenched negative bonding cycles with his employees... The mesh is difficult to see let alone analyse. Before she came home she withdrew into her inner protective child and cut off all energetic connection between the negative bonding pattern she had started at work. This is an automatic and neural response when there is no aware ego present to speak for the underlying feelings and deal with it and drive her into judgmental mother mode. In front of the Chinese man she disowns her feelings of vulnerability and becomes TEMPORARILY a guilty daughter when she felt his screams. As the screams get louder she switches off. With no aware ego available to her, she tries to mollify him in her guilty daughter mode rather than talk with him as an employee (OR JUDGEMANTAL MOTHER MODE) about her feelings and perceptions, which she can’t do well as she has not been trained to be that way, nor can she deal with it in the same external primary self manner as we have seen in the Western example above. Her attempt at peacemaking which is to placate the Chinese boss with stuff he wants to here or sulk in the corner does not work... She DOES NOT unlike Dana's western EX-wife, move into the other half of the bonding pattern and become judgmental mother (a lot of ego required for that.) There is no to and froing between guilty daughter and judgmental mother mode primary selves... This is a crucial difference.

The western woman as well as the Thai woman has disowned selves. We all have them. Disowned selves represent energies, or parts of ourselves, that are disowned or repressed in the growing up process. As each of us moves towards wholeness, there is a requirement to reintroduce these selves into our lives in a responsible fashion. This does not mean that we become these selves, but it does mean that we embrace them and discover what they have to offer us. It is interesting to note that the discomfort of our bonding patterns propels us into the next stage of growth and our judgments of one another when we are involved in these bonding patterns show us the nature of this growth, i.e., the disowned selves we must embrace.

With Thais, however much worse the negative bonding patterns get these disowned selves remain disowned and do not propel them into the next stage of individual growth as these selves have been deemed contrary to group harmony in the first place. Hence why you see individual judgments of character in Thai society do not put importance of bonding (esp. negative) patterns into account. In fact they often seem irrational and lacking in flow and someone gets knifed all of a sudden. In fact when you see negative bonding patterns escalate unacknowledged between two or more parties in Thai relationships they appear to be pathological in nature and explode without the due signals heeded. Why I said earlier that there is no seeing or noticing them in ME FIRST societies. These disowned selves in the end are like heat-seeking missiles that come back to us through our relationships and provide the fuel that intensifies the bonding pattern.

BONDING AND MOOD

Bonding in adult relationships entail a constant state of judging character and individual traits. Let us extend the first example and add the supposed qualities Dana and his missus are judging in one another. Say he could judge his missus's needs for connection and affection and her lack of attention to detail. These are his disowned selves. His primary selves could be more withdrawn, impersonal and perfectionistic , just the qualities that Thai wife is judging. Her primary selves could be personal, relaxed and able to receive from him uncritically. We might note that the judgments as stated by the primary selves make the disowned selves sound negative, but this is just what is required. In a Thai relationship most of these individual traits are discounted and we are resorting more to the emotional and harmony aspect. When you apply a term like negative bonding for people whose MO is defensiveness and resistance you are totally going against accepted psychological notions of individual relationships. When you suggest group negative bonding you are compounding the problem (as I have stated above, mapping negative bonding patterns between two individuals is a messy business and grossly inaccurate at best and attempting to do one for a group negative bonding which is dictated by nothing else but mood is to say the least an exercise in futility). It can only be useful if you can identify aspects of the bonding pattern like which particular selves are interacting what vulnerabilities trigger them, what exactly are the disowned selves and if there are any aware egos involved. This way you can actually get a group of Thais in a room and show them what their negative bonding patterns LOOK LIKE and what they SOUND LIKE i.e. cognitive therapy. The analysis involved in bonding is to do with disowned selves like guilty daughter, responsible father, controlling mother etc etc etc....and Thais would pick up on these terms immediately. Getting the aware ego to stay aware will be your biggest problem as this is tantamount to totally deprogramming them. It goes back to dealing with the biggest disowned self of all: the vulnerable inner child.

ME FIRST VS ME ONLY

Thailand is in the end a place where negative bonding is enthusiastically choreographed by mood. In addition to the usual sneering girls, you have another more subtle bunch. These are the guys who grin a lot and you think are OK...like the people at the hotel, your office or in the restaurant or even say your condo janitor. Let's say he is nice. He does not snarl at you but his dislike is latently there. Ditto with the hooker. The more she has to be nice to idiot foreigners, the more she despises people. Eventually you would catch it on her face out of the corner of your eye. Another example. When a ME FIRST BKK Chinese shop owners are trying to make a buck over your head you know they have a plan. They see a repeat customer. Oh more money but central Thais do not have a plan and are in their usual ME ONLY emotional turmoil. They do not want to see people a second time, especially a foreigner so there is an odd dynamic of the Chinese owner trying to get money and the Thai staff running customers off.

DOES THE INNER CHILD THEORY ACTUALLY WORK?

Now all this inner child cobblers was in vogue in the 70s...lots on that...keep in mind this was a yank thing and sparkled in yank psychotherapy. A clue might be that yanks are basically baby souls to begin with. So are many Thais. Saxons tend to be preteens and Teutons teenage souls, but there are basic chords running through all people. The above is insight into Thai bonding and the lack of it. Thais seem to relate to each other but not in the way we understand it. They do however come up with social tricks, bridges (culture) to cross over and keep peasant role-playing going for a while. One thing about peasant culture is unless you are on survival level it doesn't last very long. Thais do not bond any more with sex than they do with a game of tennis and don't bond with kids as they have the can't-be-bothered thing going on. The lack of bonding has them selling their kids to a brothel and somewhere in all this alienation comes out: I do not care; I do not really relate to other people; I am alone in my ME FIRST ME ONLY world; I just pretend to go along...I pretend to bond... I am faux bonding.

Final Note from documentary maker to subject: Since you celebrate the me world I think you'll do extremely well joining them in this faux bonding circus. A self declared tarzan-neanderthal who has given up on basic psychology.

The title of the mocumentary is...KHUN FAUX BONDER aka Dana.

Rick says:

Dicer,

The US/Thailand (cookie and noi) prostitute comparison was very original and farking hilarious as was the imagined session with the shrink ... the bonding analysis and the finishing electric. Sounds like u used to do this for a living? Always glad to read your pieces. You have given the "faux bonder" a reply worth every penny. Strange how these dialogues develop. You reproach the Faux Bonder for using the term "proud and discreet" or whatever and then he goes off on a rant. And you use Pants' comment as a launching board to pick Faux Bonder apart.

Just one thing...what is the exact difference between what you call "me only" and "me first"...never seen these terms in psychology.

ozricdan says:

These posts are really getting too long, however I do love to read the various rants and I have posted some myself but its rather funny when peeps gets so uptight with each other and this is reflected in the amount of space they need to make their point, so PLEASE can some peeps keep the word count a little shorter.
Failing that, why not make your own web-site so you can really personalize your views.

thanks........!

Rick says:

I can not resist to add that for those of you who don't want to read all of the above Dicer post the following I think (sorry Dicer) is the best bits, pure gold. Then again thats just me. David is the gentle funny soul of this site. Dicer is the vision man with a trenchant vocab. I mean who else would say "faux bonding circus" or "go at it like Bedouin daggers" this is like Aladdin meets Sai Tiger!

Dicer says:

While Dana screams animal power, ectoplasm and savage magnetism all he is doing here is nothing more than projecting his own inner uneasiness on mangosaucers.

Dana: Millions of years old, when prehistoric man roamed here naked and savage.... You'd like to see some hairy Neanderthal? His primitive weapon in hand, stalking through the bush like an animal, never dreaming that some day he will be extinct...and we are two savages in the wilderness you and I, my Noi...I hunt my enemies with primitive weapons...and right now will do you uninhibitedly. (He strips off the robe to show a lambskin loincloth and hairy chest)
Noi: oh my god...farang kon baa...(runs for the door but Dana grabs her and does her on the spot.)

As Dana and Noi go at it like Bedouin daggers a voiceover narrates the following...... Thailand is in the end a place where negative bonding is enthusiastically choreographed by mood....Thais do not bond any more with sex than they do with a game of tennis and don't bond with kids as they have the can't-be-bothered thing going on. The lack of bonding has them selling their kids to a brothel and somewhere in all this alienation comes out: I do not care; I do not really relate to other people; I am alone in my ME FIRST ME ONLY world; I just pretend to go along...I pretend to bond... I am faux bonding...

Since you [Dana that is] celebrate the me world I think you'll do extremely well joining them in this faux bonding circus. A self declared tarzan-neanderthal who has given up on basic psychology....KHUN FAUX BONDER aka Dana.

Eniac says:

"The full Dicer caravan will arrive shortly."

A majestic arrival worthy of a 21st Century Silk Road - not to be confused with the non-US term for the humble travel trailer. Definitely a Winnebago and all the better for it.

Dana says:

Sweet Jesus on a cracker is Dicer smart or what? And he knows a lot of words and stuff. I may not be the brightest lightbulb in the hallway but I do know one thing--If he and I ever slept together he sure enough must talk in his sleep.

Prufrock says:

Dana's MS and BGK posts are almost entirely motivated by envy and pique when he realizes someone else:
a) has read more (Dana doesn't read)
b) writes better (Dana doesn't write)
c) has his number(one trick pony)

The other site he "publishes" on has agglomulated for him a passle of the type of "fan" he claims to cultivate.

So why is Dana, the pencil-mustachioed, pith-helmeted sex-tourist in the bushes, so jealous and contemptuous of others who post well?: Dicer who has read, Tk who kicks ass and from time to time, Prufrock, who squares off with him and delivers a jarring blow and crushing knee after elbow-smash to the cunt's overblown estimate of himself.

Dana goes into boringly repetitive, inarticulately airbag-ish, SELF REFERENTIAL pique at the realization that he's been out-foxed, out-boxed and out clocked.
When Dana is whacked good and proper by anyone (in his estimation everyone he sees as a lessor luminary) he goes immediately into "isolate and smear" mode or worse , pseudo-choreographs a "life-rumba" and then hacks his antagonist for mis-stepping.

You can't even dish it out any more, Dana. Perhaps you should climb down here with the rest of us and properly engage.

Or just cut the schtick and have a chat.

We're pretty accessible.

Dana says:

Jeepers Creepers Mr. Prufrock gosh you're scarry and everything. Wow. I'd love to . . . well, whatever you were talking about . . . but I can't read and I can't write.

Only one question Mr. Prufrock--

What can your pony do?

Dicer says:

" can not resist to add ..." - Rick

Rick, I was going to say...Oh Rick...resist. Resist! or should I say desist? But then I know everyone likes flattery ... you made a good point, which was not about the flattery but choosing certain points like how do you operate in a mood framework.

"what is the exact difference between what you call "me only" and "me first"...never seen these terms in psychology." - Rick

ME First vs ME ONLY is my best way of making cognitive terms into very obvious stuff. There is much more to it and let me see...

"just cut the schtick..." - Prufrock

I think I chided TK for using this word once, the prickly character that I am. I don't like this word. I'm not particularly against Yiddish words but this one makes my skin crawl. I really don't know why. I'm not whinging here. In fact the reason I'm saying this now is it reminded me of another Yiddish word: chutzpah. Which I like. Very very popular in the US right now. Everyone is screaming chutzpah right now. Last year when I spent a couple of months there everyone was using it and I thought everyone had a cold you see. And here it reminded me of something. The Faux Bonder talks about the suprimacy of the ME ONLY world. Isn't that effrontery of the highest scale? Isn't that what is wrong with the world? If you can't understand or be bothered with the Other (at least to the bare minimum) why the fuck go out of your village, let alone another country?

Pants Elk says:

I just realised Dicer quoted an entire post of mine. An entire post! Can anyone else claim that honour? But I have to confess I hadn't read your post with the "spigot" reference to which (grammar) you think it refers. I haven't read any of your posts in this thread because I'm too busy being divorced and homeless and cracking up badly right now. But I do intend to catch up just as soon as theeeeese dammmmmn medzzzzzzzzzzzz kiiiiiiiiiiickkkk iiiiiiinnnnnnnn ...

Prufrock says:

range riding, barrel racing, and dressage

Now, answer my post of last week, you smarmy little cunt.

Johnnie Tokyo says:

Dana you vain "cunt re-build".

Prufrock said you DIDN'T read,
NOT that you couldn't read
and
that you DIDN'T write
NOT that you couldn't write

But typically, instead you've chosen to re-word and infantalize these very valid objections of his as simplistic, petty, trivial and inaccurate instead of addressing them.
And my point here is (cause you're next brainfart will no doubt be
"And your point is ....?)

And your skid mark after that will be to call me a "teacher" or something and say that we're in some kind of sand box. ... yadda, yadda , yadda

My point IS that you are LAZY, boring and repetitive but not too lazy to take cheap shots at people who effortlessly but unintentionally threaten your self-rating as an entertaining raconteur of something new and different.
(Narcissism is new and different?)

But with the above post, YOU, you non-stop paddy frog of a blabbermouth must NOW currently be out to actually demonstrate that you can't do either.
WHY?
So you can justify running shit-scared from Prufrock's perfectly civil commentary of last week.
(That Kerouac/Ferlinghetti post . . . You saw it, lightweight)

Respond to it or stop sniping away with you sophomoric cracks and your lifestyle judgementals.
And respond to this one while you're at it, as well.

Telemachus says:

Prufrock,

You insuffable bore. Not everyone wants to...

"climb down here with the rest of us and properly engage"

this is a product of your delusions. You seem obsessed with getting into "the fray" and noble debate. To the point where you will attack people who you perceive as not doing this, even when they are. Get over it!!!
What's all this we stuff "We're pretty accessible". You arrogant shit. You make out there is some elite and that you are one of them. Your comments don't make sense!!!! I am sorry to say this but you are winding me up!

I include a recent post of mine from BKKGF, gosh I would be sad if you missed it have a read...

Prufrock,

I say this as a friend, not to hold a grudge about the “we got that!” thing which was worth a chuckle but my God are you actually trying (straining) to emulate an articulate or learned (or at least what you perceive as learned) style. You comments, prolific as they are, are hmm I could use terms like verbose or grandiloquent but then I would be just like you!

Do you actually think about the meaning of what you are saying before you write it down or is it just “ohh that sounds so cool”. The linguistic equivalent to putting speed stripes on a clapped out old banger.

O.k I don’t contribute as much as you (sadly I have work but love reading MS and BKKGF articles, props) but the idea is quality perhaps not quantity. I really detest your style of purple prose. I liken myself to a TK to your Dicer. Overall I do think people afford you a lot of leeway but perhaps in reality are judging your nonsensical, bombastic crap with silence.

Keep up the good work.

Ahh, now let the games begin!"

Engage that you pompous tosspot

Telemachus says:

Prufrock it also appears your dementia is distorting your view of reality...

From your above comment:
"Tk who kicks ass and from time to time, Prufrock, who squares off with him and delivers a jarring blow and crushing knee after elbow-smash to the cunt's overblown estimate of himself"

"cunt's overblown estimate of himself" Golly gosh I can't wait 'til he sees that...

Common Sense says:

I don't know what all this psychological bullshit Dicer is posting about, but there are some funny clips in there. Dana's drink, fuck, and be merry approach is winning with me though.

Maybe that's why so many of you expats have negative views of Thailand. You've got so caught up with trying to figure the place out and find your position there you forgot what brung you there in the first place.

Beer, pussy's, and good times.

Enjoy yourself Dana, you've got your head firmly planted as far as i'm concerned.

Common Sense says:

Prufrock,
Has your multiple personality syndrome kicked into full gear today. You've already referred to yourself in the third person and then brought your Johnnie Tokyo moniker out of retirement trying to goad Dana into responding to some inconsequential post of yours a week ago on BKKGF. Yes Johnnie Tokyo is Prufrock.

Oops, did I trip up your plan to lure Dana into biting.

By the way, you don't hold a candle to TK. You lack the requisite style to "squares off with him and delivers a jarring blow and crushing knee after elbow-smash to the cunt's overblown estimate of himself"

fbuom says:

CS,

Dana's approach is not as benign as you've inferred.

There's the, "[D]rink, fuck, and be merry" approach that give's a fuck about how it affects others, and then there's, "Dana's drink, fuck, and be merry approach" that doesn't give a fuck about others at all.

One treats others, including BGs, with some respect. The other doesn't. Simple as that.

I believe that to get respect, one gives respect. I haven't seen that from Dana.

Generally speaking, I believe Dana would say he's a hedonist - if he hasn't already said it. Based on what you write, I'm assuming you may find this, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hedonism, interesting.

Otherwise, go ahead, be merry and all that. You need to learn to be a civilian, again; shed some of the 'gung-ho' cruft that _won't_ help you as a civilian (meaning not all - some of it _will_.)

fbuom

Pants Elk says:

If we're going to have a fracas right here, I'm a-rollin' up mah sleeves and steadyin' myself between Common an' Dana! Heck, I may jus' spit in mah fists an' rub mah palms together!

Here's The Smiley Boys profile:
Favourite facial expression: the smile
How we respond to a smile: with a smile
Favourite Music: Brian Wislon's "Smile"
Favourite unit of length: Miles

.... and heeeeeeere's the Grumpi Bears!
Favourite facial expression: a big ol' growly frown!
How they respond to a smile: with a big ol' growly frown!
Favourite music: "Sick Frown" by "Sick Frown"
Favourite unit of length: Megalithic Yard

What we're wearing: smiley shirts, those stupid fucking plastic clogs with holes in, comedy shorts, red noses (our own).

What the Grumpi Bears are wearing: monkish robes over barbed wire thongs.

RUMBLE!!!!

Dicer says:

"what is the exact difference between what you call "me only" and "me first"...never seen these terms in psychology." - Rick

ME ONLY are what cognitive psychologists call emotional and kinesthetics (feelers.) In cognitive development terms this is early childhood pre-operational emotion based thinking. Many people reach stasis by age 7 and the mental age stays that way for the rest of their lives. So most things are about feelings and emotions and you see them jumping rope all day in their mood swings. With that comes a fear based personality (negative emotions) and resistance to change. Basically their general reaction to change is reluctance if not refusal. So it appears ME ONLY people are all about emotional self and tend to be adept at inductive apriority thinking; that is, can simply mull a problem over and resolve it without going through a cognitive process. It's like when doing maths the student magically comes up with the answer but does not know how he got there.

On the other hand ME FIRST are what cognitive psychologists call operational black and white rules based people (auditory.) In cognitive dev terms this is age 11. Sort of internalised ego. Again these guys reach stasis at age 11 and stay there for the rest of their lives (as opposed to further developing into visual cognition, critical thinking etc.) They understand rules and can organise themselves.

Hence my example with the ME ONLY central Thai shop assistant and the ME FIRST Chinese shop owner. What both groups are aware about is the inner world and are very very conscious of their private world and you see it in conversation (say in a casual banter with a Thai or Chinese) as a kind of expression of their unconnected selves. Basically conversation lacking in sequence and detail.

Another good example of ME ONLY: Walk to Soi Cowboy and look at the cute go-go girls in Sheba who are tranced out on themselves in mirrors. And then step into After Skool and its smoke, which makes Chiang Mai look like a healthy place to live. There are these horrible looking Khmer tarts defocused on old farangs.

If you looked globally Northern Europeans and North Americans are largely visual (future thinking, reformist, strategic, analytical) and Asians are basically auditory (listeners, stability seeking, conservative, content with status quo) and most Euro Latin/Latin Americans, Africans and Mid East people are kinesthetic (emotional, feeling, nature-agriculture oriented, spiritual.) Exceptions in all areas of course where people have mixed cognition.

Funny thing about Dana is he mounted his high horse and quoted me the "Know Thyself" stuff. When it really comes down to no bullshit is when these people go to another country. For instance the emotional-kinesthetics Lao, Khmer or Muslims have a problem adjusting in a visual critical US society whereas the rules based but me first Chinese do ok. The feeler/visuals (I suspect like our chum here) come to a place like Thailand and go psychotic. Actually I can't say Dana has gone fully psychotic here as he's worked out some home-spun hard and fast rules to use in Thailand which by and large work for the visitor. The thing about "know thyself" is intricate though. The goddess Neith at a temple in Egypt has this inscription: I am that which is, that which was and that which will be; no one has lifted my veil. Now Hegel quotes this in the Philo of history and says truth is a problem here. Much later this problem was solved by Apollo's admonition at Delphi: Know thyself. Here the Faux Bonder tethering near on his high horse says to me "you get A for Know Thyself," something I can't say about him. What he doesn't realise is that truth, observation and external analysis don't come easily to me me me me me people as they are the emotional self and not the object self. Whereas me first people - like the Chinese - cede control when in fear and tow in line in more of a know thy group and know thy place, me only people regress to a static, its best to leave life unexamined sort of thing.

"...drink, fuck, and be merry approach is winning with me though" - CS

well who can’t be won over with that?

"...many of you expats have negative views of Thailand. You've got so caught up with trying to figure the place out ...you forgot what brung you there in the first place" - CS

"trying to figure the place out" is a process of finding out more about yourself and examining your assumptions.

The point is when you saunter around your country or your home town you can be carefree and share the same common assumptions with the people around you. When you go to another country and try to do the same you'll find out soon enough that it does not work even if all you care about is drinking and fucking. You can try to pay your way through things you don't understand. You can even hire local servants to act as a buffer for that fuck fest utility zone. If you are the short time tourist this may be ok but the longer you stay in a foreign country and the less willing you are to find out about the Other the less tenable your position is. Simple really. In fact all the mental problems you do not see in people in the US, UK and other fairly complex countries - unless you have a team of shrinks wringing it out of them - are displayed in full Technicolor when the same people are transferred to third world countries. Like when you were in Iraq, your assumptions and beliefs are yours and if you tried them on the locals it wouldn't last five minutes. So then, why in the hell do some think they can do here in Thailand what they do at home? I've seen them end up crackers, others get bitten so hard they leave the country tail firmly tucked between legs and others even end up RIP. It's not Dana's fun seeking nature that is wrong and alarming here CS; it's his shameless mimicry of a ME ONLY mentality that is wrong at every level beyond the animal world. So yeah screw and get plastered all you can but if self preservation is an instinct you possess keep this in mind is the gist of it all.

Prufrock says:

Dana is over-rated; mostly by himself.
I may have hinted seven or eight times that, (sigh) that Johnnie Tokyo name belongs to me as well. Fuck man, they all posted at length and they all earned a reputation . They weren't just one-off's. Okay maybe a drunken Anonymous once in a while. Or the notImtiazmuqbil one either. I don't recall ever making a secret of that.
I have my reasons. Most of them are private and medical ;-)
I don't care, Common. Really.

But Dana could never answer my direct posts (as Dana). He's so self-absorbed that he actually thinks he has too much at stake to get into it with ANYONE who can hit back. And he's too stupid. I'm thinkin' David Hasselhoff's brain in Woody Allan's body. Or if Pattaya had a Sonny Bono it would be Dana. Anyway you get the play. He'd use an alias rather than get the shit kicked out of him as the clever Dana. My names alway stood up for themselves. You should know.

As to the holding of candles, mine or anyone else's, you all can see for yourself what a completely narcissistic pussy Dana is without my help.
I have NO pretenses in regards to the erudition of Dicer and his use of these boards for his own purposes AND our edification and Tanai Kwai who has the motivation to build and adapt his fascinating room.
Just as no one who senses that David, here is being ragged by some cunt puts up with it for very long. If a mere poster reacts on behalf of the site's "Sietgeist", well that's because he feels that some cunt has caused unnecessary trouble.

My similarities to Dicer and TK involve having a similar beef with this gainsaying nitwit. My beefs are similar to annoyances expressed by Dicer and TK or anyone else who goes to the trouble to address a snipe from this cunt and get a childish one-liner in response.

I need no reflected glory from these guys. You do us all an injustice by suggesting I am positioning myself there. I save THAT shit for the office.
I have serious differences (as serious as it can get in this flat medium, anyway) with someone who natters away with cheap shots after I've posted or like Telemarketus, who freely admits he has fuck-all to contribute except that he wants to scrap but he's too busy with his Dana identity give us anything of value. He's a bit of a shit-weasel as well.
But unless he IS Dana and admits it, I won't bother responding. What's the fucking point? As he admits, his posts lack substance.

My objections to Dana are limited to what motivates him to post here (these sites). He never really makes anything resembling entertaining contributions; like Kasman, he just takes shots here and there at the people who do. When you turn around and square it with him he fucks off back to his lady-boys.
Dana's a pussy, Common.
He simply can't abide the notion that there are others out here with the brains and the ability to write circles around him.
Which Dicer does. And most others do. Grunt does. Road does. Kenn does. Many of us do.
I mean you and I may have had limited appeal back there, Common, but our marathon scrap was highly entertaining TO THE POSTERS WHO I GIVE A SHIT ABOUT and YOU WERE AMONG THEM. It was certainly MORE entertaining and informative than any of the shite that Woody Hasselhoff was slapping up on Stickyfinger's site at the same time. Jaisus.
Dana, you stunned cunt, get out here and answer for yourself.

Dana says:

Ya know, Mr. Dicer--the main thrust of my query/essay to you was "why must I be sensitive to others?". And you have responded to that. You have ideas. Your ideas include things like 'civilized values', and 'tool needed for mental health', and 'survival', and 'successful integrating of oneself in society', and a lot of 'just because it is a good way to behave'. And you buttress (?) some of these Dicer ideas with name calling and inferring. You didn't use the word but a lot of your name calling dances around the word psychopath. Other name calling dances around the fact that I must be so ignorant that I do not even know what I do, or know what I am, or imagine my effect on others.

If this was a debate and I had been given the card with your side of the issue I could have made the same arguments in the same way. But a debate is a game. Life is not a game. Life is a painting we only get to paint once. We choose the paint and the content.

I do not believe I have to be sensitive to other people's needs in countries other than my own, and I do not believe being sensitive to other people's needs in countries other than my own is proof of a civilized me, and I do not believe that being sensitive to other people's needs in a country other than my own confers benefits to me. It is all crap.

I am a successful social animal. Strangers will loan me money, and workmates think I appreciate their sense of humor, and neighbors ask my opinions on things because I appear to value our relationship. Parents ask me to babysit their children. But is a mask. I don't believe any of it. It is all meaningless crap. The only important thing is what is in my heart and mind. Me. That is the difference between me and you Mr. Dicer. You actually believe this childish nonsense. I do not believe this childish nonsense. You and I are not equal. I am more evolved. I am the parent Mr. Dicer. You are the child with your silly psychobabble toys, and your plastic Jesus on the dashboard of your car, and your multiple degree persona.

If you ask to borrow my lawnmower neighbor Dicer I will loan it to you. But I do not believe in the experience, and I do not believe in you, and I do not believe I will get the lawn mower back. The only thing I can count on is ME. I will participate in your precious 'good neighbor' psychobabble experience because I am a successful social animal but I do not believe in any of it, and I am not wasting my time being sensitive to your needs. The notion that I should be sensitive to the needs of 3rd world people is just laughable. Your idea has no currency, no evidence, no underpinnings, or logic. It is just emotion masquerading as advanced education and civilization Mr. Dicer. Handy cocktail party chatter to impress the dark skinned big breasted Israeli backpacker--but not the stuff of smart people. You should be ashamed of yourself for posturing on the net in such a silly way and giving yourself away as a common thinker of no import. I would feel sorry for you; but--I am not sensitive to your needs.

divad says:

Prufrock = Nutter

Telemachus says:

Telemarketus, heheheh, I like that.

You are very much in your own little world Prufrock and I'm happy about that as it means that you are not in mine.

Telemachus says:

Just a note on the mental case "Prufrock". This type of personality is interesting in how it works. It insinuates itself into an "in" crowd with sycophantic bullshit, creating group of "right" people" while simultaneously looking for one person to be "wrong".

It takes attention away from its insecurities by directing the "group's" attention to this "wrong" person and how they don't fit in with its illustrious mandate i.e the noble and fearless debating group or whatever qualities it has assigned to it. When in reality they may be just doing their own thing. It is a hierarchical mindset pathologically driven by the insecurity of the person.

Noted psychiatrist Erich Fromm called it group narcissism:

Goes kinda like this...
eventhough in reality I am a worm, I am part of the greatest group in the world and can therefore bask in the reflected glory.

but what definies a group? Yes its outsiders so for Prufrock there will always be an outsider someone who doesn't fit in with his created group, someone to fight with, someone to not measure up to Pruffies wholly imagined ideals (which are, to reiterate, a group that mostly is a product of his mind, with him as a prominent member having ascribed to them the quality of always being right)

Nietzsche said it best about people like Prufrock:

"where there are six of you one will surely have to die"

or Patrick Kavanagh in referring to

"the dangerous men who are always in procession searching for someone to murder or worship"

from the poem No Social Conscience. Its about people who don't stand up to shits like Prufer or Johnny Tokyo or whatever he calls himself these days.

I only have one "handle" Pruffy. It is Telemachus from Homer's Odyssey. Telemachus is the son of Ulysses. I have only ever used one name and only ever will unlike you...

"My names alway stood up for themselves. "

You crazy, crazy little man.

Telemachus says:

One more thing,
I may not post in bulk turgid shit volume, like you but my posts have some substance and I can also relax, unlike you...
Grosse bise,
Telemachus

Telemachus says:

Dana,

I can see your point but it must get a bit lonely being alienated like that, you know, alone even though you are surrounded by people kind of thing.

I possess a genuine empathy for others(I think) there's a real social streak in me but I believe Nietzsche would still be proud of my enlightened "self-interest"!

Who knows, maybe there is a balance to be had between being completely on your lonesome and living completely as someone elses bitch like Prufrock does.

Regards,
Telemachus

Izzy Einstein says:

"I am a successful social animal. Strangers will loan me money, and workmates think I appreciate their sense of humor, and neighbors ask my opinions on things because I appear to value our relationship. Parents ask me to babysit their children. But is a mask. I don't believe any of it. It is all meaningless crap. The only important thing is what is in my heart and mind. Me."

This is American Psycho (Dana) talking. You are obviously proud of being a sociopath and a calculating ego maniac without any regard for others. Please let us know who you are so the rest of humanity can stay out of your path.

Common Sense says:

Dicer,
As always you have some great points. The problem with getting them through to me is that I generally fall between a multitude of your psychobable terms. I don't recall the personality type I fall under, but I do recall it is very rare. Everytime I have had to take one of the silly tests shrinks have come up with I always end up in that last group of people who it seems can barely be classified.

I can easily relate to your ME ONLY (feeler) group in that I generally mull problems over and the answer just appears to me without a cognitive process, much the same as those math geniuses do.

I also relate to your ME FIRST group in just as many ways. I recognize rules, organize myself, and see a very much black and white world.

I see Dana's point when he talks of why give a fuck about being sensitive to others. Not that I go about pissing the world off though. I'm generally a very sociable person and manage to fit into any group I'm exposed to. I'll play the game and do the necessary things to keep order, but once annoyed or pissed off any attempts at sensitivity go out the window. I do however posses a knack for using such common sense reasoning that any ill feelings easily wash over.

I'm probably a mixed up nutcase, but I have the ability to survive in any given situation.

fbuom says:

Dana wrote,

"Your idea has no currency, no evidence, no underpinnings, or logic. It is just emotion masquerading as advanced education and civilization "

Gosh, Dana, that damn near exactly describes your 'idea', too.

To paraphrase Voltaire, your devotion to ME ends at the tip of another ME's nose - no matter where you are or who they are. I don't think you've picked up on that yet, or you've made sure the noses you poke belong to those who either can't or won't poke back.

As for your idea that women only look for the 'alpha male'. Some truth to that theory has been found. You conveniently left out the part about what kind of man females look for in long term relationships. But then, you're not looking for that kind of relationship, are you. Look forward to a lonely old age. Pray that it's short.

Personally, though not particularly religious, I'll take the advice of some truly great philosophers in the history of the world:

http://www.teachingvalues.com/goldenrule.html

Trust me, it's not just the Judeo-Christians who suggest it.

fbuom

anonymous says:

What a bunch of boring, long winded panty wastes you all are.

Prufrock says:

Izzy? Always cool to hear from someone with a fresh appraisal of an old problem. This twat has been infesting the boards of Stickman, MS and BkkGF and like sites for ages.
He's a pest and a bore.
Dana is he most graphic example of "a legend in his own mind" that is salvageable from the current record.
Just look if you will at the downward spiral trend of Stickman's "Dana comments" since this "Blue Pill" addled nitwit started off three and a half years ago.
When he ran out of things to say he didn't know that it might be a good idea to stop typing.

Prufrock says:

divad: "fough-bouaowgh yob" and, um, isn't it time you saw a dentist?

Telemachus says:

Prufrock, you Sir, are a coward!

Dicer says:

Members of the not-so-holy synod of the Church of Dana convene under a mango tree somewhere between Pattaya and Jomtien. The Pretender presides pontiff-like surrounded by the following and several other characters:

Mr Fettes of New Jersey USA (from the above Pattaya City News article); Mr Oliver Jufer of Switzerland http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/
6440645.stm ; The moderator of this thread: http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/
index.php?showtopic=64646... and the son of this fella http://www.cbc.ca/world/story/2004/02/27/
cult040227.html ... his name is Ken Owasaki.

For the purposes of control and inner-directedness (the reason Dana gives them) he is at the same time the chair, moderator and organiser of the psuedo ecumenical circus.

Scene is set mid afternoon under the tree. Dana is in a white robe. He is about to invest his toilworn disciples with sacerdotal functions. They are half the way through the discussion:

Mr Fettes: So Dana are you telling us that you only love yourself?
Dana: Yes, the belief that a continuity of consciousness or identity and potential to display beneficial qualities can be recognised outside Dana, the spiritual master's heartbeat is a falsity.
Mr Fettes: So what are we supposed to do?
Dana: worship me of course.
Thai Visa Geezer: How can we worship someone who's incapable of having a shared experience?
Dana: The Church of Dana is esoteric as it requires more empowerment to ME. That is the more devoted you are to me the better I love myself.
Mr Fettes: But thats for you. How does it benefit us?
Dana: Once you master Danian Tantrism you'll understand.
Thai Visa Geezer: What do you mean by "Danian Tantrism?"
Dana: Masturbation
(members exchange incredulous looks...)
Mr Fettes: Masturbation?
Dana: Yes. The four tenets of the Church of Dana. The first is masturbation. When you masturbate you think about me and any two of my appointed fantasies.
Mr Fettes: Appointed fantasies? What are those?
Dana: First have I told you my views on masturbation? For me, the nicest thing about masturbation is afterward...the cuddlingtime.
Oliver Jufer: That iz magnifique... The guy iz a genius. In my Swiss canton we'd have a referundum about this.
Thai Visa Geezer: And the second...
Dana: I have a perfect survival kit. I've been working on it for years. No needs of others, no experience of others', no shared environment...
Mr Fettes: Why, are you moving to Montana?
Thai Visa Geezer: No of course he's not moving to Montana. He means spiritual survival kit. Right Dana or is it something else?
Mr Fettes: No he meant it literally.
Oliver Jufer: You'd be so easy to love Dana, so easy to idolize, so worth the yearning for, so great to keep every home fire burnlng for

Dana: Children hush hush. I am the parent and the god here.
Mr Fettes: Ok tell me what you meant by Survival Kit?
Dana: All of you have to buy a rifle, fish hooks, waterproof matchboxes, torchlights, water purification tablets, flare gun, snake bite stuff and some anti-acid.
Thai Visa Geezer: What for?
Dana: as you go through life, you learn to depend only on yourself, so you need a firearm
Thai Visa Geezer: No. Why would I?
Dana: For self-defence.
Thai Visa Geezer: Against who?
Dana: Against those who conspire to harm you.
Thai Visa Geezer: Harm me?

Dana: Don't ask what you did to deserve it. The more you worship me the better. Until then you need the survival kit. All of you'll come with me.
Oliver Juper: I go anywhere with you mon cher.
Mr Fettes: Go where?
Dana: OK once I'm back stateside I know a cheap place to get surplus Russian Army rifles.
Mr Fettes: I still don't understand why we need rifles. I don't need a rifle. I'll probably wind up blowing my foot off.
Ken Owasaki: I like guns!
Dana: Suppose you're home one night in bed, masturbating, you know, doing the Dana prayer as we call it and some guys break in. You need protection.
Mr Fettes: I'll call 911
Dana: Call 911? come now.... those people never answer the phone...it's like asking for a mortgage.
Mr Fettes: By the time I got out of bed and loaded it, the damage would be done. I don't need a weapon.
Dana: Everybody needs a weapon. Besides that's why you need a loaded weapon. You have to learn to take it apart and put it together blindfolded. You may have to do it in the dark.
Mr Fettes: Why, are you expecting Nazis in a blackout.
Dana: I meant when you masturbate in the dark, doing your Dana prayer.
Thai Visa Geezer: What does this gun nonsense mean?
Dana: It means the day will come when you wished you had one.
Mr Fettes: I should keep a loaded gun in the house?
Dana: Why would you keep an unloaded gun in the house?
Thai Visa Geezer: I wonder Dana..Do you hear voices on the radio or worship snakes?
Dana: Hey that's blasphemy. I worship only ME. ME ONLY. And so should you.
Thai Visa Geezer: (to Mr Fettes..) Dana must be a member of one of the most persecuted minorities in history.
Mr Fettes: What would that be?
Thai Visa Geezer: A narcissitic, delusional paranoid megalomaniac...I know I know...sounds like a contradiction in terms.

Dana: Children I am the parent and the god here.
Mr Fettes: So you keep saying.
Thai Visa Geezer: You still haven't told us who we REALLY need protecting from.
Dana: Burglars, rapists, the Gestapo. Given the tensions in the world, you should get ready for the Arabs... perhaps it would be prudent to have CCTV on your person all day and check out what everyone did around you all day.
Mr Fettes: (mumbles to himself...)Perhaps reshoot the dailies. Yeah, I mean reality doesn't matter does it?
Dana: Oh and dark Israelis too!
Thai Visa Geezer: Dark who?
Dana: Dark Israelis
Mr Fettes: How about a mullah or two Dana are they acceptable? Do you pray that the lost tribes of Israel should remain lost I wonder? How about the lighter Israelis are they acceptable? I've heard Dana use the expression "dark Israeli" Jehovah knows how many times...
Dana: Its the Church of Dana interracial abortion gene-splicing thing.

(all the other guys exchange looks...and Mr Fettes whispers to Ken Owasaki)

Mr Fettes: I think he's had a mental breakdown.

Dana: Children I know it seems weird but there is no other way except the Four Tenets of the Church of Dana
Thai Visa Geezer: So the first two are masturbation and survival kit. Ok. What are the other two?
Dana: My third philosophy in life is do it to him before he does it to you
Thai Visa Geezer: That sounds like the screeplay for Murder Incorporated
Dana: There's an old joke about a prizefighter in the ring. He's getting his brains beaten out. And his mother's in the audience, and she's watching him getting beaten up. There's a priest next to her and she says, 'Father, pray for him.' And the priest says, 'I will, but if he could punch, it would help.' As you go through life, you learn to depend only on yourself.

Thai Visa Geezer: The obvious right? But still what is the point.
Dana: As I said, do it to him before he does it to you.
Mr Fettes: and the last one....
Dana: The last tenet of the Church of Dana is controlled coitus.
Thai Visa Geezer: That's like sex but ...erm controlled?
Dana: Yes... When you have sex with a Thai woman or a ladyboy always make sure you have the survival kit next to you and all locks and door knobs in the hotel room are taken out. Surround yourself with garden plants stolen from the lobby and tell your hooker to lay still.
Thai Visa Geezer: lay still?
Dana: yep. Ok For example I told Noi from Soi 7 yesterday " If it's tough grit yout teeth, close your eyes, hold yourself stiff and I'll start to pound you just the way I like it....please no needs or sensitivities OK?"
Mr Fettes: You said that to her?
Dana: Yes. it is called Insensitive Thrust.
Oliver Juper: That is stupendeous mon cher I will give anything to you...do you want me for free tonight.
Dana: So my children a quick recap. The Four Tenets of the Church of Dana are: Masturbation Dana Prayer, Survival Kit, Do It To The Other Guy Before He Does It to You and The Eternal Insensitive Thrust. These and a nonstop worship of ME and ME ONLY will lead me to love myself more. And now my children we pray together...

Kenn says:

Dicer,

it looks like you got the makings for a pretty good screen play;
you should show that over to Disney, they will make movie about anything nowadays

Trent Trekker says:

Nana Plaza has a good bucking bronko I went on for 3 minutes with out falling off.
And good sky train home ,
Advice dont drink beer after the bucking bronko makes your head spin.

Trenty.

dave says:

One lady boy told me in MSN chat boobs cost it about 85,000 baht.
Hmmmm I thought how the hell did u get the money?

I worked for it and laughed