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January 10 2006

Thai gigolo slams farang girls

Thai gigolo slams farang girls

"The tourists are fine but farang girls who've lived here for any length of time are a total nightmare," explains veteran Thai gigolo, Yai.

I was introduced to Yai a few weeks ago when he was wooing a huge Aussie blonde in a popular Bangkok nightclub. His bulky date was six foot tall and built like a pro wrestler.

Their size difference reminded me of the black widow spiders often featured on Animal Planet. As soon as the tiny male has delivered his sperm package, he's got to be quick on his heels (all 8 of them) or the huge female will gobble him up.

Fortunately, Yai survived to tell the tale - which is precisely what he did when I ran into him again this week.

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His relationship with the Australian yeti was clearly over. She was smooching with another gigolo just a few yards away. "You're a braver man than me," I said. "I wouldn't want to take on anything that size."

Yai smiled and replied that, in his view, farang girls possess an important quality that most Thai girls lack - the capacity to speak straight. I had to agree with him but, despite much head-scratching, neither of us could think of a second area where farang girls come out on top.

I suggested to Yai that Japanese girls might offer the best of both worlds but, given the obvious difficulty of bagging one in Bangkok, I had to concede that I was in no position to prove it.

Confident now that I wouldn't be offended, Yai launched into some straight-talking of his own - his honest opinion about farang women.

He said that the tourists were usually fun to be with and were both respectful to him and appreciative of his efforts. In contrast, however, farang girls who had lived in Thailand for any length of time were a total nightmare.

He complained that they would expect a Thai man to act like Prince Charming 24 hours a day while they themselves would make zero effort. To make matters worse, they'd also flirt quite openly with any other guy who took their fancy.

There were plenty of examples around to prove his point. I counted about half a dozen farang girls - all of whom were regulars - happily cavorting with any number of Thai fellas and clearly getting off on all the attention. Each girl must already have slept with half the gigolos in the place but it didn't stop them coming back, night after night, to pick up another one.

A fun-loving farang guy would never get away with shitting in his own nest to this extent. Thai women go completely berserk when a former lover tries to pick up a different girl right in front of them. You have to admire the restraint of the long-suffering Bangkok gigolos who manage to keep smiling.

Prior to meeting Yai, I'd assumed that chubby ex-pat girls might show a bit of gratitude to the charming Thai gigolos who work so hard to brighten up their lonely lives. However, it seems that I was wrong. Servicing these hard-to-please young ladies is clearly a tough job - even when you're getting paid for it.

[Posted to Farang Life by David]

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Readers' comments

sammsky says:

where do you hang out? Can I watch you, an evident master at his trade, at work?

Do you knoof any "pick up" courses as written about in THE GAME available in Bangkok?

Kukamunga says:

You whitey guys do kind of the same thing with the Thai girls but with a few differences. And your big and awkward by Thai standards too , but I'm sure you know that already.

ozricmann says:

where did you get that photograph from.....that must be the ugliest women ive ever seen.

another reason to move to thailand if there were not enough already.

Spare Partz says:

I don't know why falang women even bother to come here...how do you afford to bring all that extra baggage on the flight over? Thai women, even the ugly ones, look far hotter than the average guava.
Have some more cake, fatty.

mike says:

bringing your falang is like bringing sand to the beach

jollyboy says:

who's the babe in the picture? I say to all fellow brits why go to S. E Asia when there's all these cuteys in the U.K.

Road Natzi says:

David,

That chick looks like the female version of Keith (I love to lick the dags off my wifes arse) SUMMERS.

What a pig, I bet shes got a massive set of balls (unlike keithie).

JOhn says:

not sure about your point of view about farang women but what you say about thai women dead wright i dumped a thai girl and started to chat up another thai girl my ex girlfriend went mad and i have never seen a women go as mad as thai women do so if you want my advice pick up women away from you ex

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