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I'm horribly fascinated by farang sex freaks (See Does farang life turn you into a sex freak?) so I jumped at the chance to go freak-watching in Pattaya. Typically, freaks set themselves apart by combining questionable dress sense with an unfortunate hairstyle and odd sexual tastes.

My mate devised an interesting drinking game. As we sat in a bar on Walking Street, we played competitive freak-spotting. Over 2 hours, an even number of freaks would make me the winner. He needed an odd number. We saw ZZ-Top wannabes, body-modification junkies, Conan the Barbarian and a cowboy arm in arm with a giant ladyboy and a midget-girl. Eventually, we lost count and all bets were off.

Top freak of the day was a powerfully built bloke in his 60s wearing only blue denim dungarees over bare flesh. I reckon that the seams were Velcro - allowing him to disrobe in a split second. A ridiculous ginger wig made him look like a mutant Jim Bob Walton.

The photo is a bit of a cheat because I actually snapped it on Ko Samui. Wearing only flimsy black underpants, our bubble-permed hero rampaged around the town centre. Like a striking cobra, he stuck his tongue into every passing Thai woman. Notice how an unseen hand pushes another victim into his sloppy embrace.

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[Posted to Farang Life by David]

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