November 6 2003

My lethal anecdote and the Heimlich Manoeuvre

Heimlich Manoeuvre

Last night, a friend of mine nearly died when we were eating dinner together in a local restaurant. I was telling him a funny story when suddenly he got a piece of steak lodged in his throat.

I leapt up and pounded his back in an attempt to dislodge it. An American guy dashed over from a couple of tables away and expertly performed the Heimlich Manoeuvre. Thankfully, my friend coughed up the blockage and was able to breathe again. The swift actions of the American guy may have saved his life.

In contrast, the Thai staff were completely clueless. As he coughed-up half a pint of gunk onto his dinner, they acted like my friend was insulting their food. They took away his plate and didn't return with a bowl.

The moral of this story is that you can't expect Thais to save anyone from choking. Basic life-saving skills are almost unknown here. Read on to find out what to do if you find yourself in the same situation.

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Before you take any action, make sure that the victim really does have an obstruction in his throat. The Heimlich manoeuvre carries with it a small risk of injury, so you should not perform it unnecessarily. Ask the victim if he can breathe. If he has only swallowed a gulp of water the wrong way, he won't thank you for acting too hastily.

Never allow the victim to lock himself in the bathroom. His desire for privacy could cost him his life. If his airway really is blocked, you should do the following:

Tell him to stand up and say that you are going to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre.
Hug him from behind, making one hand into a fist. Place your other hand, palm open, over your fist.
Position your fist over his solar plexus (the soft area between the navel and the ribs).
Tell him to lean forward slightly.
Sharply pull your fist in and up. This will push the air out of his lungs under pressure, clearing the obstruction from his throat.

The procedure should work first time but, if necessary, it can be repeated up to seven times. If that doesn't work, tell the victim to bend forwards over the back of a chair and strike him between the shoulder blades with the heel of your open hand. The blow generates gaseous pressure in a blocked airway and, with a head-down position, sometimes works when the Heimlich manoeuvre does not.

Once the obstruction is dislodged, it will take a few hours for the victim to recover but there is no need to take him to hospital.

Happily, my friend is now fully recovered from his brush with death. In case you are wondering what the near-lethal anecdote was, I was describing how Thai women often wear jeans without a belt. When they bend over, onlookers are sometimes rewarded with a delightful display of builder's bottom. Please learn the Heimlich manoeuvre before you mention this to anyone else.

[Posted to Diary by David]

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Readers' comments

Anonymous says:

2 fellas in a pub having a drink when a woman nearby starts to choke on a bit of her scampi. One of the fellas rushes over, pulls her jeans down and runs his tongue up her backside. In shock she coughs out the offending obstacle and the fella returns to his mate and says," That hind-lick manouvre really works

May 3, 2006 10:05 AM

Brian says:

A woman sitting at a restaurant in McKinney, Texas
suddenly began to cough while eating a giant country-fried steak.
After a few seconds it became apparent that she was in real distress, and
two cowboys at the next table turned to look at her. "Kin ya swaller?"
asked one of the cowboys.
The woman signaled 'No', desperately shaking her head.
"Kin ya breathe?" asked the other. The woman, beginning to turn a bit
blue, shook her head 'No.'
With that, the first cowboy walked over to her, lifted up the back of her
skirt, yanked down her panties, and slowly ran his tongue up and down
the woman's butt crack. This shocked the woman into such a violent spasm
that the obstruction flew out of her mouth and she began to breath again.
The cowboy slowly walked back over to his table and
proudly took another drink of his Lone Star beer. His partner said in
admiration, "Ya know, I'd heard of that there Hind Lick Maneuver, but I
ain't never seen nobody do it.

May 15, 2006 5:26 AM

sally says:

A baby is being fed bits of apple,
The baby gets a bit stuck in its throat and becomes purple in the face
"Your babys choking" cries a man
The man rushes over and performs Heimlich Manoeuver on the baby
"To stop a baby from ever choking only feed it baby food no solids"

November 12, 2006 4:36 PM

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